Willits
Willits is a shit town in NorCal where everyone is either a stupid Puritan hippie or a stoner who was neglected as a kid and thusly uses that to justify their mindlessly fake-deep actions. Willits is also the home to the world’s dumbest lumber jack statue. Everybody knows all the words to Hotel California there, but none of them know what it means. Also the cancer rate is like 10x average cause PepsiCo ruined the water supply.
Person 1: “Yeah I grew up in Willits”
Person 2: “Oh I had a cousin from there he’s a hardcore addict now who runs a blog about heavy metal.”
Person 3: “Yeah that’s a pretty shit town. Everybody dates their cousins in law at some point cause nobody’s mom can seem to stay married for long”
Person 2: “Oh I had a cousin from there he’s a hardcore addict now who runs a blog about heavy metal.”
Person 3: “Yeah that’s a pretty shit town. Everybody dates their cousins in law at some point cause nobody’s mom can seem to stay married for long”
Willits by Nerium—Oleander September 2, 2019
