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The Impaler 

A man with a large/thick penis whose superior genetics allows him to thouroughly dominate the opposite sex. The sometimes rough and repeated pounding of her guts with The Impaler's shaft may leave the woman sore the next day(s).
Oh my gosh, I'm like, so sore. The Impaler crushed my insides last night.

Vlad the Impaler 

The real Dracula. Far from the cape-wearing bloodsucker, Vlad the Impaler was both a hero to the Romanians, helping to defeat the invading Turks, and at the same time a brutal monster (butchering people to prove a point, once again to the Turks). His favourite execution methods outside of impaling included getting boiled alive.
Vlad III "the Impaler" "Dracula" Tepes was a hero of the Romanian people.

Almost everyone else only knows Vlad the Impaler for the stakes.
Vlad the Impaler by GalactaK May 1, 2020

Vlad The Impaler 

Vlad Tepes, Prince of Wallachia, was a figure in the Medieval era who has become connected with the Dracula legend. Forget bloodsucking, this guy was in to much more hardcore stuff. He impaled friend and foe alike. One he turned back a Turkish army when they saw thousands upon thousands of their comrades dead on wooden stakes. Once, when an envoy refused to take off his turban in his presence Vlad had it nailed to his head.
Of course, this didn't help Vlad when the Reaper came knocking for him. Eventually he was killed, by the Turks or rebellious nobles we cannot be sure. But his head was cut off, preserved in honey to keep it sweet and then stuck on a pole.
Despite his apparently hideous crimes Vlad was a good ruler. He insisted on total loyalty from his people and his ruthlessness aided him in his war against the Turkish invaders. When first ascending to power one of his first moves was to imprison the treacherous boyars who probably killed his father. And rather than heap favours upon old Lords he apparently prefered to knight members of the peasantry.
Although, as we've seen, it wasn't enough to save him.
Vlad The Impaler was a horribly cruel man but an effective warlord and disciplinarian.
Vlad The Impaler by Tyburn January 2, 2008

Lex the Impaler 

Street name for Lexington Steele. Porn star specializing in anal sex on white women. Gigantic penis known for annhilating the likes of Miko Lee, Monica Sweetheart, Gauge and Aurora Snow.
After doing a few scenes with Lex the Impaler, do those chicks have to wear diapers?
Lex the Impaler by The Kid! June 17, 2004

Lex the Impaler 

A mutant chigga with a hyperextensive penis long enough to impale most people. His favorite trick is to sneak up behind people while they tie their shoes, and ram his iron pecker into their anus and out through the tops of their heads - killing them instantly.
"Run, women get inside your homes and bar the doors! Men, grab whatever weapons you have and flock to fight the beast in the Town Square. The creature, Lex the Impaler, has broken through the city gates!"
Lex the Impaler by Anonymous April 29, 2003

chad the impaler 

The potentially best male porn star name known to mankind. Based off the legendary historical figure Vlad the Impaler who also impaled thousands.
"Oh man, I get to film with Chad the Impaler, I hope he spikes my rectum"
chad the impaler by cjt119 March 13, 2019

Vlad the Impaler 

The male sex organ used to eject semen and urine out.

More commonly know as a "penis".
Vlad the Impaler invaded the Ottoman Empire.
More from Urban Dictionary

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
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