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telefon

Are you using the telefon?
by Urban dictionary official. January 14, 2019
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telefon

In translaion from russian or Azerbaijnish i means phone or phone of 90's
i bought new telefon
by YASMALPOLOJENNIK May 29, 2020
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Long schlong telegong

Long schlong telegong is a common phrase among german teachers when singing along loudly in the classroom. It can be written as Ľ0ňğ Șçhĺòńğ Țėľêğõňğ, too.
"Yeah Ľ0ňğ Șçhĺòńğ Țėľêğõňğ ❤️❤️❤️", sings my teacher. "Aiaiaiaiiai Long schlong telegong", answers my colleague.
by gollomosh September 3, 2022
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telebong

The act of smoking a bong on Skype or a similar service.
Hey dude, lets connect online later and we can Telebong!
by lolcat216 September 22, 2018
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telefornication

Also known as "phone sex."

(phrase invented by AJ)
-I have been having these constant urges for telefornication.
-We telefornicated all night.
-When you move to Knight's Bridge, are you going to telefornicate with your lover?
by looover May 31, 2006
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Telefunken u47

a metaphor for a large dildo. it refers to the u47 microphone made by the German company called Telefunken, it was originally used by Frank Zappa in his album Joe's garage. the cylindrical shape plus the fact that the name sounds like fucken you, lend to the humor
Larry: we got a present for you

marry: what is it, what are you ganna give me
Larry: it looks just like a Telefunken u47... you'll love it
marry: with leather?
by aman of the box May 21, 2010
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Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder

Unlike Truman Show Delusion sufferers who see themselves as being the unwitting main character in a reality TV show, Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder sufferers see their life as being full-blown scripted, expensive serialised drama TV Series. They frame each year of their life as being a 'season', each week roughly equating to a single 'episode' of their show.

The sufferer twists known facts and does mental gymnastics to shoehorn their mundane lives into some form of 'season arc' for their character.

They know full well that they aren't really in a TV show. - they just desperately want to be.

Ultimately, Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder is just a tactic employed by the miserable to deny reality - those who know deep down that the only way their life can have meaning is not through art or expression, giving and charity, a relationship with God but instead by forcibly contextualising everything as being a carefully scripted, story-boarded and rehearsed piece of fiction to be consumed by only the sufferer themselves.

The sufferer inevitably commits suicide or dies in their 'series finale' - Whether their TV Series achieved excellence and a satisfactory conclusion (Breaking Bad), was cancelled before its time and fondly remembered (Party Down), went seasons too long and became a shadow of itself (The Simpsons), (Dexter) can only be determined by the dead sufferer's friends and family at the funeral.
Q; "What's wrong with Caleb? He said he hadn't seen me since 'Season 2', and that he thought I'd been written out, whatever that means?

A: "Dude yeah he's got Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder' - just nod and smile. He'll kill himself if he thinks his show might be getting cancelled or resorting to cheap plot twists"
by J-Lime August 5, 2016
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