Smegmartini 

An alcoholic beverage that consists of smegma, jizz, STIs, bollock sweat, piss, shit and vaporised arsehole hairs. Best served cold with a lemon on the side.

Katie: “how was last night with Jack?”
Kim: “It was good, he made me an awesome smegmartini. Took the enamel right off my teeth!”

Smegmartini by Gawkinator 5000 August 1, 2021

smegmatitis 

Rash or inflammation caused by titfucking with a cheesy penis

Q: What's that poxy rash on your chest, bitch?
A: That's smegmatitis from tit fucking with Rastus's alabama black snake. He aint washed it for a month!

smegmatitis by Argusm May 20, 2007

Smegmatician 

A connoisseur of smegma who is very skilled in identifying, producing, and harvesting the delicious substance.

Tony: "This wine is bland."
Justin: "Good thing you are in the presence of a smegmatician! I have the perfect fresh smegma to pair with this bottle."

Smegmatician by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012

Spermartini 

A classic vermouth cocktail with an olive and a good dash of jizz.

Virgin Spermartini is the socially more acceptable form with vanilla ice cream minus the olive.

Damn, I got dolfed, there´s an olive in my Virgin Spermartini! I hope I don´t get superaids...

Spermartini by TopGunther February 20, 2011