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A guy who likes MILFS, and is very funny
Did you see Jessica's mom she's so hot, I feel like a scole.
Scole by 82729183$6-7373 May 4, 2016

schlemazel 

A perpetually unlucky person. A person who's often a victim of something bad. From Yiddish.
A "schlemiel" is the guy most likely to spill the wine at dinner.
A "schlemazel" is the guy most likely to have the wine spilled on him.
And the "nudnick" is the guy most likely to ask (in a nasal voice), "Gee, what kind of wine was that anyhow?"
schlemazel by Osama_Bin Login January 12, 2014

citrus scale 

One of the ways to rate fanfictions. The citrus scale goes: orange, lime, lemon, and grapefruit. Though some people add other fruit in, it is mainly just those four.
Orange: Sort of the equivalent of PG-13. Doesn't really get beyond kissing
Lime: less explicit than a lemon, but still has sexual content. Characters do not have sex in a lime, but it is pretty close.
Lemon: Probably the one you will hear of the most. The characters in a lemon have s-e-x
Grapefruit: This one has two definitions. One is a really weird lemon or lime. The other is non-consensual sex. The second definition can be written as g-rape-fruit sometimes.
Pie1: hey, what is that story pie3 is writing on the citrus scale?
Pie2: errr...lime
Pie1: WHY NO LEMON
Pie2: you're weird....
citrus scale by icecreamistasty February 22, 2015

Mohs Scale of Internet Hardness 

Based off of Mohs Scale of Mineral Hardness, this scale is a measurement of how dark one's World Wide Web content can get without being mentally perturbed. It is typically described as a 1-to-10 scale with a single example from each level.

1. Google - What the fuck are you, Amish?

2. Youtube - Yawn.

3. Youporn - You've experienced a taste of the dark side of the Internet, but there's still a long ways to fall.

4. /b/ - The level where most Internet Veterans find themselves comfortable. Yeah, something funny here, something disgusting there, but you've seen it all before.

5. Goatse - You're a grizzled vet. As for the previous tiers, you might've been disgusted...when you were ten.

6. 2girls1cup - As the masses comment about how terrible this is, you simply scratch your head, and wonder what the big deal is.

7. Adultfanfiction.net - I'm starting to worry about you, man. I mean, you didn't flinch at all at the three paragraph description of how the once-transparent lube became chocolate as Adam and Chris simultaneously forced their penises down Jake's virgin asshole? You're either really brave, or really crazy.

8. Beastality - Just...stay away from me. Please.

9. Pain Olympics - Alternatively known as the John McCain tier, for not even years as a POW may prepare you for this level.

10. 3guys1hammer - Get a gun, rest the barrel in your oral cavity, and pull the trigger. You should survive the shot, for no mortal could survive this level.
Individuals as described by the Mohs Scale of Internet Hardness:

Your Grandparents - 1

Your Dad - 2.5

Newfag - 4

Oldfag - 5

Auschwitz Survivor - 8

Infant Rapist - 9

The Antichrist - 10

Asian Grading Scale

Regular kids:
A = Great
B = Good
C = Average
D = Okay
F = Bad

Asians:
A = Average
B = Below average
C = Can't have dinner
D = Don't come home
F = Find a new family
Asian: *crying*
Other kid: Why are you so sad?
Asian: Cuz I have a B+!
Other kid: Well I have a C- and my parents think that's pretty good
Asian: On the Asian grading scale, B's are below average
Other kid: Sorry
Asian Grading Scale by aiyah9000 December 1, 2013

Fujisaki Scale 

The Fujisaki Scale is a scale for measuring the intensity of Tornados based upon the damage an egg would inflict on construction materials.
Dale. This tornado's already at level two on the Fujisaki scale. A storm that strong can send an egg through a barn door. Two if one of them is open.

Bobby. What does a level three do, Mr. Gribble?

Dale: A level three can send an egg through a brick wall. Tornado chasers call it Humpty's Revenge
Fujisaki Scale by RayRoy Strickland January 20, 2013
More from Urban Dictionary

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
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