person number 1: "oh wow Justin the football player, takes a long time in the bathroom"
person number 2: "hes probably masturbating while he shits"
person number 1: "haha, Justin shasterbates"
person number 2: "hahahaha thats clever. shasterbate!"
To go to the restroom, informing everyone you intend to take a shit, and remain in the restroom for an extended period of time while actually masterbating
Scott: Where is Kevin?
Andy: Oh he is in the bathroom, has been for 20 minutes, said he was taking a shit.
Scott: Oh, he must be going to shiterbate.