Pattern blindness 

An effect caused by staring at something for so long that the person's vision becomes warped or distorted

"I stared at a wall for so long I got pattern blindness." (not a real quote)

Pattern blindness by You'renotauthorizedtobehere April 30, 2025

Male Pattern Blindness 

When a man will search for hours to find something that is laying out in the open on a table. Items are often easily found by a women.

Man: "I have been searching for hours for keys."
Woman: "You mean the ones sitting there on the coffee table?"
Man: "Where?"
Woman: "Right there in the middle of that table."
Man: "oh, must have been Male Pattern Blindness"

Male Pattern Blindness by diablo581 February 10, 2008

Male Pattern Blindness 

Male Pattern Blindness / Pattern Male Blindness - A condition that afflicts men in which they are in a situation where a woman is giving every signal he needs to make a successful close but he does not notice. Later on, he may finally realize his blunder but the realization comes too late.

A girl might give a guy IOI's (indicators of interest) such as touching his arm, playing with her hair, or laughing at his unfunny jokes. A guy with male pattern blindness, usually due to lack of confidence, assumes she is just being nice when in actuality she wants him to hit on her / kiss her / fuck her / etc...

Male Pattern Blindness by Evil Ryan February 29, 2008

female pattern blindness 

When fully grown women who should know better wear clothing that is fundamentally mismatched, i.e., a striped skirt and a plaid blouse.

That fat cow of a lady over there is wearing a plaid skirt with a striped scarf. She obviously has female pattern blindness.

female pattern blindness by Feliz the Great January 19, 2005

Male Pattern Blindness 

An affliction suffered by both men and women, however most often by men. It is marked by an enthusiastic penchant for assigning certain bad habits as something women do, and inexplicably not noticing it when men do the same thing in the same frequency.

(in the car)

Brad: OMG! Get off the phone lady! Freakin women always have their cell phones out!

Marla: Brad, you txt and drive all the time. That guy over there is talking on the phone. And the guy next to us is also texting. Everywhere I go there's a dude talking on a cell phone. I can't walk anywhere on my college campus without being stuck behind both girls AND guys on the phone.

Brad: (*snort*) Na-ah!

Marla: You have a bad case of Male Pattern Blindness.

Male Pattern Blindness by YouKnowItIsTrue November 19, 2011

male-pattern blindness 

like male-pattern baldness but its dudes being unable to find shit thats in an obvious place.
typically solved by someone else (typically a female) pointing it out

Cyno: Where the fuck did I put my airpods case
Dehya: They're over here. God damn, male-pattern blindness hit you hard.

male-pattern blindness by fishgaming July 30, 2024