Coined by comedian Bill Burr and his girlfriend Nia Hill (aka the "Lovely Nia") and shared with his legions of fans via the Monday Morning Podcast.
Refers to something that should be good but ends up being bad. Originated when Bill was about to give Nia a back massage (good) but didn't rub his hands to warm up the lotion which resulted in Nia getting shocked by the sensation his cold freckle-marked hands on her warm skin (bad). Should be said like an African American pimp stereotype from the 1970s.
Person one - "I got a raise a few weeks ago and finally got my pay check. Turns out I was bumped into a higher tax bracket and I now net less than before."
Person two - "Shiiiiiiit bro, that be some cold lotion!"
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Person one - "I finally got a date with Margret. Afterwards we went back to my place to fuck but when I took off her shirt she had the worstbanana tits ever. I couldn't get it up."
Person two - "Ooooooo that is some cold lotion son!"
1: From German "lüren" which means 'to lie in wait' and Rhenish "lei" which means "cliff." Lorilei is an alternate spelling of Lorelei, which is best traced to a German myth naming a rock where a siren sits to lure men to their deaths. It has also been translated as: "murmuring rock."
2: A beautiful woman that could lure you anywhere with her playful attitude and warm smile. A deep woman who loves each and every thing she sees, simply because they are a part of the universe she lives in. A diverse woman of many colors, shades, textures and talents. A powerful woman who will travel farther, dance harder, sing louder and live fiercer because she knows what it means to live and not just what it means to survive.
1: I was walking down by the Rhine and Lorilei tried to drown me again...