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Johanneke's are usually Dutch. They are crazy weird but in a way you feel drawn to. They have beautiful soul snatching eyes and a smile that makes your heart skip a beat.

They live for taking care of the people they love, showering you in their insane amount of mom energy.

They are hella smart too. Hella? Yes, don't think she's an angel, even though she looks like one from the outside.

There's a demon residing inside her. And you either get a succubus, vampire or a murderous beast. Be careful what you wish for.

If you ever find one, as a friend or lover: keep her happy. You will forever regret the day she leaves you.
That's Johanneke, she's Dutch.

Don't look into Johanneke's eyes, she will steal your soul!

She's such a mom, that Johanneke.
Johanneke by Joadmirer November 22, 2021
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Your best friend. The one that’s always there for you. This person is amazing, always there for you and looks fire. She’s trustworthy, loyal, fashionable and above all kind. If you ever feel like your world is falling apart this person can fix it. She is so inspiring because of the light that she can bring on to others. Sometimes she can be a bit stubborn but that’s just because she thinks their friends and family deserve the best that she could think of. To sum it up, this person deserves the world<3
Johanneke is amazing
Johanneke by N._<3 November 22, 2021
A beautiful girl whose smile can light up the room. She will get the most loveliest boyfriend and take immense precaution of their relationship. A Janneke will get hurt but will always retaliate stronger than ever.
"I really wish I could find a girl like Janneke"
"She has a boyfriend, of couse"
"...dammit."
Janneke by ZoSMURF September 25, 2011
Johannes is the tallest sexiest bloke with the biggest dick around. On top of this he is the most good looking and the smartest man alive.
Johannes christ our lord and saviour
Johannes by Choklad papi March 6, 2017

Johanned 

When a woman lets a guy move in and takes care that fuckboy and he leaves once he gets you pregnant.
Me: What's new with Kesley?
Drew: You haven't heard? She got Johanned.
Johanned by Huh-wtf? June 12, 2018

johannesevangeliet 

Johannesevangeliet is a boring man with a boring past, he should not be a subject in school
omg you'r sooooo boring, is you'r name Johannesevangeliet?
johannesevangeliet by franky fly_ February 27, 2020
Originated from the Hebrew "Jahwe", meaning god. Johannes is the most awesome name a guy can have, defining him as superhumanly good looking, smart and courageous.
Casual expression:

"Oh my Johannes!"
Johannes by SophoJoJo February 6, 2010
More from Urban Dictionary
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026
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