Top definition
Pretty much the best guy you'll ever find. He's insanely talented, beautiful, and strong. He'll always be there at your side no matter what kind of hell he has to go through to get there. He's your best friend, no matter what, and you can talk with him about anything and everything. You'll always laugh together, through the highs and the lows. If you've got a Johannes, keep him around. He's worth it every time.
"Who's that?"

"My boyfriend, Johannes"

"Girl, marry him now."
Get the mug
Get a Johannes mug for your coworker Paul.
2
Originated from the Hebrew "Jahwe", meaning god. Johannes is the most awesome name a guy can have, defining him as superhumanly good looking, smart and courageous.
Casual expression:

"Oh my Johannes!"
by SophoJoJo February 05, 2010
Get the mug
Get a Johannes mug for your bunkmate Sarah.
3
English spelling of the name Johanna reserved for hot girls who normally have a wild side that every guy falls in love with.
Omg dude did you see the hot girl dancing on the bar she was totally a Johanne.

Wow man i wish my girlfriend was a johanne
by phillip the monkey March 07, 2011
Get the mug
Get a Johanne mug for your papa Callisto.
4
This can also be a name for girls! Johannes may look quiet and shy at first but if you befriend her your life would probably be shining with rows of rainbows and weirdness. But if you like or have a crush on her, just go and ask her if she likes you too. Also she is smart, hot, kind, generous and the girl who would always be there for you(Also not a plastic friend). So gurl *snap* *snap* be like JOHANNES!
Rupert: Hey this girl made my life smile. I think i like her.
Mitch: Dude, you fell inlove with a Johannes .
via giphy
by JohannesThat November 25, 2016
Get the mug
Get a Johannes mug for your bunkmate Julia.
5
Crazy Nazi faggot. Consistently pulls out .45s in class and pops students he doesn't like. He then proceeds to make the Jewish kids (if there are any left) clean up the brain matter. Sips tea and hails Hitler daily.

Refers to students as "bitches" and "dirty Jews".
by The Great Malevolent Force November 26, 2013
Get the mug
Get a Johannes mug for your guy Zora.
6
A black nigga who always wants beef
Oh shit it’s johanne
Frik run he’s gonna drop us (or at least try to and fail)
by TheBoyNextDoor69 January 23, 2018
Get the mug
Get a Johanne mug for your guy Beatrix.
7
The dumbest idiot ever. He thinks he's the coolest fckboy, but irl he's a fcking whore dipsht. He has no friends and thinks the world revolves around him. He only has around two 'friends', that don't like him at all, but feel sorry for him as he's so stupid. Seriously, I don't get how someone can be so dumb. He follows the one girl after school, bake disgusting sht for her, blames sht on her when things don't go his way, stalks the girl, admires and jerks off to the girl and many more.

Idiot, I hope you see this. Ew, you disgusting, pathetic shtface.

P.s you don't have any abs or muscles. You just have flabs and rolls.
1: Omg who's that idiot over there?
2: Must be Johannes, or 'JB' as his stupid nickname..
1: Lmfao it is that idiot!!
2: I don't even need to turn around to know which dumbfck it is~
1: Ikr, I heard another girl rejected him!
2: Of course, he's so desperate for a gf!! But no one's dumb enough for him lmao!!!
1: Yep! Let's go my eyes aren't enjoying this view of him. Yuckety..
via giphy
by taken by her November 27, 2018
Get the mug
Get a Johannes mug for your Uncle Abdul.