Jesus fucking

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When you fuck so hard and fast that you die and then revive 3 days later, and then get sent up to god's bedroom to do the same thing there.

Person 1: where the hell am I?
God: in my bedroom
Person 1: how did I die?
God: Jesus fucking...
Person 1: what?! Why am I in your bedroom
God: cause someone who can Jesus fuck only appears every 2 thousand years, now get in bed...

Jesus fucking by A complete joke April 23, 2017

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jesus fucking christ

A statement that is often used in a situation of utter disbelief, shock or frustration. It is arguably a blasphemy as well. Also used fervently by the character Tony Soprano on the Sopranos.

"Jesus fucking Christ! I missed the concert!"

"Jesus fucking Christ, Carmella! Close the door!"

jesus fucking christ by NightStalker935 December 20, 2017

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Jesus fucking Christ on a pogo stick

Exclamation of surprise or shock as a result of nothign short of a miracle.

Jesus fucking Christ on a pogo stick! How did you get pregnant without having sex?!

Jesus fucking Christ on a pogo stick by scalz July 10, 2006

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Jesus Fucking Christ on the Cross

Perhaps the most offensive, non-racial phrase. It can be used as an exclamation when one is under stress. The phrase is synonymous with "Jesus Christ."

Jesus fucking Christ on the cross, I forgot to take the trash out last night!

Jesus Fucking Christ on the Cross by lemonlime69 November 6, 2014

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jesus fucking christ

the way italians say i haven't seen you for a while

jesus fucking christ man, i aint seen you since that shit went down with that cocksucker pontius pilate

jesus fucking christ by ray March 24, 2005

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jesus fucking prius

Phrase, in shock or anger of being driven into (or otherwise unacceptably intruded upon) by an unapologetic, self righteous, silent car.

"Jesus fucking Prius!"

jesus fucking prius by Streykidd March 28, 2015

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jesus fucking kennedy

An expletive phrase linking and interfusing two individuals bound to the American psyche by their early deaths and cults of personality. The intermingling of the names punctuating a moment of intense frustration or hopelessness.

Jesus fucking Kennedy, is this traffic going to move or should we start building condos here!

jesus fucking kennedy by Andrew the Coiner March 19, 2008

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countrypolitan

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.

That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.

countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006

Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

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Witch Bath

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.

She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.

Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020

Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

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kinktober

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction

That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.

kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018

Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

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proper lad

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad

person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad

proper lad by its_ya_boi_chips_ahoy May 20, 2018

Word of the Day on October 29, 2026

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sexspan

The number of years you are still sexually active

While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.

sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022

Word of the Day on October 28, 2026

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womp

A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.

You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.

womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011

Word of the Day on October 27, 2026

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