Guidonics

Proper noun. A guttural dialect spoken largely in Italian-American neighborhoods or at the Jersey Shore by Italian-Americans, largely a combination of stock phrases like fuhgeddaboudit and malpronounced Italian words (i.e. gabbagool for "capocollo") that are passed off as being true Italian. A subset of English that makes real Italians cringe.

(A sample sentence of Guidonics below)

Vinnie: "Ey yo, youse wanna come over for dinner? My mom's making macaronis wit gravy."

Guidonics by The Gob o' Ghouls January 11, 2013

Guidosis 

A condition caused by watching too much Jersey Shore or going to clubs infested with too many guidos and guidettes. Similar to zombie-ism. Orange spray tan may rub off on you, you may find yourself doing the guido first pump, turning up your collar on your white shirt, talking like a douche or picking up skanky bleached blondes or guidettes.

One dude to another: I have a ranging hangover and I woke up with my bluetooth in my ear and there was orange spray tan on my white shirt and the collar was up! WTF!!

Another: We can never go to that club again. You've got guidosis. Jump in the shower and scrub down now!

Guidosis by sarasplayroom.com October 19, 2010

Guidonculous 

An adjective to describe the behavior of a greaseball who may display the following:
wears too much cologne; drips hair gel, wears New York Giants/Jets/Yankees clothing; abuses steroids, rocks a large chain; ends every sentence with "bro;" asks for Jagerbombs incessantly; preys on drunk women.

"Did you see that guy with the Yankees jersey try to hook up with that wasted girl? That's guidonculous."
"That guy in the Members Only jacket is wearing a guidonculous amount of Brut cologne."

Guidonculous by J.Yeager January 10, 2009

Guidonia 

Homeland of the Guidos, an ancient race of smelly, tan dumbfucks.

"One cannot simply walk into Guidonia."

Guidonia by The Duke of Hemophilia January 21, 2010

Guidoism

A sentence or phrase a Guido would say to make himself look better or to down-talk a "non Guido" type, but in the process making himself look more like a fag than he already does.

Guidoism-

Guido: Yo bitch my name is Dan "The Man" get it right.

Normal Person: HAHA your a fag.

Guido: Yo! Hop off, not my fault i get more pussy than you. *Kisses his own muscles* haha im so amazing.

Normal Person: *Shoots self in the face*

Guidoism by anti-guido March 18, 2009

guidovic 

A multicellular organism that spreads through your cyberlife presenting symptoms of pain and irritation similar to a bad rash. Like a cyber version of a guidouche which is a pussie/douchebag combo.

That guys is all over my facebook wall like a guidovic

guidovic by dbbshr June 24, 2010

guidoness 

having the swagger of a guido

kevin b

Kevin- "Damn, get off me shawty"

Corey- " Kevin you and your guidoness are something else"

guidoness by thefallstonguido June 15, 2009