by Freddsky March 26, 2011
Hi, i'm a JTV greeter and i'm better than everyone else in this chatroom because i have a badge next to my name'' ''... what a prick
by JTVgreetersaretwats August 4, 2010
The job a person gets when they wake up every morning, put a gun to their head, but can never summon enough willpower to pull the trigger.
As I entered the store, I was approached by the walmart greeter. Our eyes met for only a moment, but it was enough to see the deep, painful hopelessness in his gaze. Whoever the person he used to be had died long ago, leaving a spent shell, an automaton. An emotionless drone pretending to be a human being. "Good morning." he said to me. In subtext he might as well have said "Please kind stranger, kill me and end my existence, for I have not the strength to do it myself." Pity stayed my hand, and I made a mental note to avoid Walmart at all cost.
by weasel1969 July 1, 2010
A poor miserable soul who's life is usually a total mess, not because they are extremely unattractive, unheathly, soiled, and smell like feces, but because of the simple fact that the only job they could get is sitting at the entrance of wal-mart stumbling around scaring small children into taking stickers. These people greeters usually have no more than 4 teeth total and weigh more than the average refrigerator.
"Joe, are you sure we should go to wal-mart? We have to take the kids with us and last time the people greeter drooled on them and gave them herpes."
by MrNiceGuy October 11, 2005
by juxtaposer December 25, 2008
Uh-oh, crazy Britney Spears showed her "gentlemen greeter" again when she was getting out of her car at Starbucks.
by ImBringingBloggingBack December 29, 2007
Usually someone of lesser intelligence or of a mentally impaired category. Top choices of wal-mart greeters are usually those with down syndrome, saggy balls, vaginal gericatric bat disease, or work release programs. Typically found at the entrance of walmarts, and sometimes packing a roll of different colored stickers in which they appraoch you as if to molest you and whatever item youare carrying and at the last moment... hand extened... a round sticker of random color is stuck on the item you are holding... assaulting it... and labeling it a return or previously paid for item.... running from the wal-mart greeter is usally followed by people with walkie talkies running after you....
I don't realy know of a given example of walmart greeter grab a simple roll of already opened toilet paper and walk into any walmart.... you'll see one of the above... stalking you like a jilted speed dater on a rape quest. Blind people can even sense a wal-mart greeter by the constant sniffling of runny snot... and the faint odor of cottage cheese.
The walmart greeter at our store dripped snot on a radio I was returning and stuck a rainbow of stickers on my 3 yr old. When I tried to walk to the return desk "Bubba" followed my 3 yr old who was crying and asked if she "wanta to see my pokemon pee pee?" I have a lawsuit pending.
The walmart greeter at our store dripped snot on a radio I was returning and stuck a rainbow of stickers on my 3 yr old. When I tried to walk to the return desk "Bubba" followed my 3 yr old who was crying and asked if she "wanta to see my pokemon pee pee?" I have a lawsuit pending.
by sanity clown October 28, 2006