Fingender is a umbrella term for any gender that feels feminine in nature, A couple of fingenders are associated with womanhood but not every fingender does.
tapping your fingers in a rhythm, playing your "drumset", and is most commonly found because the person who is doing it is bored or becoming impatient. can also be done with slaps.
The only thing that sucks worse than taking the SAT is taking it while listening to the guy behind you do his fingerdrumming like he thinks he's got skills of an actual drummer.