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Doing a John

Entering a public toilet and using the facilities improperly; often involves leaving faeces in the toilet bowl without initiating the flush mechanism.
"See that bloke over there, the one with a newspaper, he is doing a John."

"Dirty bastard"
Doing a John by Graham Marsh October 22, 2004

Doing a John

Lusting after a young girl with the intention of postponing a sexual proposition for an undetermined number of years.

Often the perpetrator will announce the number of years he intends to wait in a grumbled tone.
So my little sister just started junior school. Yeah, she is doing really well, better than I was at that age. Hey John, I won't be in lesson because I've got to go and pick her up at three.

Four more years...
Doing a John by Graham Marsh October 24, 2004

Doing a john

to unexplainably lose all your money in five hands of poker
'Damnit five hands and im all out!'
'shut yo jibba jabber and stop doing a john!'
*crys then begins to masterbate*
Doing a john by lewis B October 23, 2007

Doing a John

The act of leaving work early after doing the absolute minimum amount of time required
I can't be bothered with this today, I'm doing a John, see you all tomorrow.
Doing a John by WraithDad June 19, 2026

Doing a John McCarthy 

Going into a store with a huge jacket, then whilst facing away from the cashier starting to in a really sensual way touch all the candy and putting your hands down your pocket smoothly.

is usually done when on ones phone
Damn nigger cashier thought i was stealing and punched me in the face and balls. Guess i was doing a John McCarthy
Doing a John McCarthy by Negerslaven November 24, 2011

Doing a John Cena 

Doing a John Cena means that you go in both places and disappears on naked eyes.

Term came from John Cena, a wrestler known for flashy squash moves.
Ben's a fan of Cena, and he's Doing a John Cena right now.
Doing a John Cena by Kay Tutan Tayo December 28, 2018