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600 calorie pack 

When instead of eating the intended 100 calorie pack and being healthy, you eat the whole box (of 6).
She's so fat, always eating 600 calorie packs!

calorie bomb 

Any food item, snack, or meal that contains an ungodly amount of calories (and usually fat, too). It is guaranteed to go straight to your waist, hips, and/or ass, blowing your figure to hell in the process.

Guilt and the consumption of calorie bombs go hand in hand, although the former is rarely strong enough to override the impulse to do the latter.
Bob: "Oh man, I just ran five miles, and I was so hungry when I got home that I inhaled an entire goddamn bag of Cheetos."
Larry: "Why would you do that? You just got hit with a calorie bomb."

Jenny: "I think I'm going to order dessert. Mmmmm, chocolate cake."
Susy: "Two words: CALORIE BOMB. Are you sure you still want it?"
Jenny: "Well, not when you put it that way."
calorie bomb by J - Train April 20, 2010

burning calories 

1. I didn't get any sleep, we were burning calories all night.
burning calories by otay May 20, 2005

empty calories 

Foods that only contain calories but no additional nutrients like protein, fiber, vitamins and minerals.
Person 1: Would you like some soda?
Person 2: No, that's just empty calories. I'll have juice instead.

Person 1: Want some candy for dessert?
Person 2: Nah, I'll have a baked sweet potato instead.
empty calories by areallnamestaken December 8, 2010

400 Calories 

Supposedly making out for 20 minutes burns 400 calories.

Actually, 400 Kilocalories, but food companies thought it would be easier to denote those things we burn as calories, so what the hell. Apparently metric prefixes are fucking scary.
Chad: "Hey Lisa want to burn 400 calories?"
Lisa: "Sure Chad, but I'm not taking off my pants...yet."
{ 20 minutes later }
Chad: "Wanna burn 400 more."
Lisa: "Let's go for 2000. Take off your pants."
400 Calories by tron.von.tronicus January 8, 2008
Word of the Day on February 10, 2008

calories 

tiny, microscopic creatures who live in your closet who sew up your close each night to make them smaller. They do this out of jealousy and hatred for the human race for not recognizing them as existent.
Calories: dude, she did not just put her fav jeans in the closet, get my sewing needles.