Assturdbating
The act of squatting above a toilet, seat up with both feet planted firmly upon the toilets cool porcelain bowling, knees pointed outward so that heels point toward each other. While balancing upon the bowl, the person proceeds to reach between their spread knees , under their genitalia aiming toward the anus with both hands and when the butt cheeks are withing reach, grab each cheek in a tight grip and begin pulling the cheeks apart. At this point one's head will be positioned with their genitals at about eye level pov but upside down. As if they were trying to crawl into a rabbit hole while performing a front flip. Once the position is achieved take a deep breath and headbutt the lower belly and hold the pressure with your brows and forehead while kneading your butt cheeks violently and pushing the contents of your bowels out. If done properly without slipping or falling or breaking a hip, the pressure upon the intestines coupled with the angle of pressure and separation of the backdoor mudflaps, should result in a steamy pile exiting the bowels. Assturdbating.
Robbie thought it was perfectly normal to assturdbate until he was caught doing so by his father who quickly and violently corrected the young man.
"What's that guy doing in there?" Asked John
"He is probably assturdbating. The opiates constipate him." Replied Susan.
"Assturdbating is a common act down south. It is not considered taboo to do so multiple times a day"
"What's that guy doing in there?" Asked John
"He is probably assturdbating. The opiates constipate him." Replied Susan.
"Assturdbating is a common act down south. It is not considered taboo to do so multiple times a day"
Assturdbating by BillyLaPierre509 June 8, 2025
