Apple Hard

When you are so excited that your boner is harder than normal. Usually in reaction to receiving a new Apple product, of which said product will probably be outdated in 6 months, making the power of this boner fleeting, but truly powerful. When one becomes "Apple Hard", they often experience a feeling of superiority, usually over people who use PC's. While this feeling of superiority may be misguided, the power of the Apple Hard is often too powerful for the novice and one succumbs to the massive pull of the boner.

My new iPad just came, and I am Apple Hard right now!

by FBRPonline June 3, 2011

Hard Apple

A rock solid shit built up in your colon, ready to tear you a new asshole the second you sit on the toilet

John: “Where’s Noah?”
Marvin: “He’s in the bathroom, he said he had a hard apple shit built up, feel sorry for the guy.”

by NoahJPhi February 11, 2020

Appletard

Refers to an overly uncritical devotee of Apple culture, or iLife. Synonym: iTard.

Some Appletards even began lining up outside stores for the iPhone a week before its realease.

by JoshuaSmith November 3, 2007

Appletard

The losers that choose to stand in line for hours at an Apple store any time Apple releases something new.

That Appletard has been in line since 4pm yesterday to get the new iPhone.

by WartimeFirefighter June 27, 2010

Appletard

An individual whoe entire life is devoted to - indeed defined by - the existence of Apple products

ZOMG, crApple just released a new iPhone/iPad/iPod/iCar/iShoe/iChair that is slightly different to the model I already own - let's all go an queue up for four days just to be the first to own it!!!

Shut the fuck up, you Appletard

by Zebulebu June 5, 2011

Mark Appleyard

Dope, Fresh, Refreshing, Good to hear, Fucking Fantastic, Amazing

Guy 1: This bitch ran out of photo class crying because she couldn't come up with explanations of what the photos meant to the whole class
Guy2: Haha, no way. that's sick
Guy1: but get this, I laughed after 15 seconds of akward silence
Guy2: mark appleyard


' I got this mark appleyard-ass-bud the other night '

Brovader:Do you remember flip sorry?
Broskiwalker: yeah. that was mark appleyard

by mark appleyard March 30, 2009

appleyard

To be able to rip of people with out them knowing, or working out that in fact what they are paying for is worthless.

Im going to do a "appleyard" on my website.

by Rip it of January 1, 2006