Contra blumpkin

Act of recieving a rusty trombone.. Aka the anal carwash...while continuing to urinate.. (rusty trombone= a hole being licked)

"While standing at a urinal in the office bathroom, jill came up behind me, unfastened my pants and continued to lick my anal porthole. The feeling was exceedingly intense. It's like doing the contrapositive of a blumpkin. (if ~q then ~p = if not getting head while shittig then not a blumpkin).". "dude she just gave you a Contra blumpkin...sick & twisted"

by Bocks of rox June 6, 2009

Country Blumpkin

The act of jerking off whilst taking a shit.

"Dude.... Palmala Handerson just gave me a Country Blumpkin!"

by halfinsane April 26, 2009

blumpkin slushie

similar to the blumpkin hat (giving a swirly post blumpkin) but this time you have diarrhea

Karly drank all of my blumpkin slushie last night, it was awesome!

by taco hut March 17, 2009

Super Blumpkins

The act of giving a blowjob while receiving an abortion.

"Omg did you hear what Becky did? She gave her doctor at the planned parenthood a super blumpkins! Talk about squashing the patriarchy!"

by Katiekilljoy December 21, 2017

Blumpkin con Queso

Whilst performing a blumpkin, the individual exercising fellatio wears a sombrero loaded with chips and queso dip allowing the receiving party to enjoy simultaneous south of the border pleasures.

Alternative; Blumpkin con Salsa

While evacuating his bowels, Paco enjoyed the Blumpkin con Queso his girlfriend so selflessly provided.

by MasterBlaster666 November 5, 2013

Self Serve Blumpkin

Similar to a Blumpkin except there is no second party involved. The self serve consists of jerking off while taking a dump. The self serve happens much more regularly because you do not have convince a slore to blow you when taking a crap.

Mike muth was on the prowl for a blumpkin but wasn't coming up with a suitable candidate, therefore he had to resort to the classic self serve blumpkin.

by Baller26 May 21, 2008

Triple Decker Blumpkin

An act involving 3 willing participants. The first participant removes the lid of the cistern on the toilet and sits in while proceeding to take a nifty little dump inside. The second part-taker sits AC Slater style on the toilet bowl performing fellatio on the first participant whilst pissing into the toilet. The third and luckiest particpant will be kneeling like an alter boy with their lips firmly clasped in a suction grip around the anus while the second participant power dumps into their mouth. To finish the third participant then proceeds to splurge a creamy-corny parcel onto the bathroom floor.

Larry: you should have seen what I caught peter doing earlier. I walked into the bathroom and he was sitting top-deck in the ensuite having a triple decker Blumpkin with with Greg and Sarah. Shit everywhere.

Nora: :O

by TheBlumpkinator August 1, 2012