Top definition
A male receiving genital stimulation whilst simultaneously taking a shit. A white out and a brown out at the same time. Perfect.
We were very poor growing up on the farm. My half-sister Stephanie was sadly a simpleton but she gave the most beautiful blumpkins and I loved her for it. I say loved because in the fall of 1987 she was found mutilated in the back of a green Chevy van. That's actually not true as I never lived in the country and am an only child but it's still a beautiful image as I'm sure you'll agree. Someone from Arkansas will fap to this definition.
by mammarylane October 23, 2015
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Feb 27 Word of the Day
From STEM, an abbreviation short for "Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics", a STEMlord is a pejorative term for a particular kind of person who has studied in these areas at university or works in these fields who holds a pretentious, condescending attitude to anyone who has studied in any other fields, particularly the Arts and Humanities. They typically believe themselves to be more "intelligent" and "rational", while generally remaining incredibly ignorant outside of their areas of expertise and having the charisma of a rotting pig's backside.
"Ugh, I wish Reddit wasn't full of STEMlords the entire goddamn time."
by nopeidontneedanameok October 15, 2015
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2
Getting a blowjob while sitting on the toilet taking a shit. It has never been pulled off & anyone who would do this is probably someone you wouldn't want doing it to you.
Dude she was so ugly and fucked up I probably could've gotten a blumpkin.
by Ben Yaass Dover August 04, 2018
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4
The delicately balanced art of getting your cock sucked while taking a dump.
Morty made frequent trips to the office restroom, but never when the janitor who calls Costa Rica is there, because that janitor like to give Blumpkins.
by Von Hayes March 09, 2005
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5
The act of performing oral sex on someone who is taking a shit.
Ex: "I gave Carl a blumpkin lastnight"
via giphy
by SleepyKitty2021 March 22, 2019
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6
Receiving a Blow Job while taking a shit. If done to perfection, than you will die. If both cum and shit excape your body at the same time, then yes you die. If you dont believe me try and find someone who has.
There are no examples for a Blumpkin. Everyones dead.
by blumpkinmaster December 20, 2007
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