desk granola

All the bits and pieces of food, hair, fingernails, and lint that are found when you turn your computer keyboard over.

"My keyboard quit working. The IT guy said it was full of desk granola."

by AGRODEO July 12, 2014

desk midget

When a co-worker likes to hide under the desk of his superior to either gain information or give pleasure to his recipient.

"How did Hector find out Store#2 was closing?" "That desk midget overhead Dean while he was sucking him off."

by The Savage @ West U November 5, 2015

desk rabbit

Someone who hides under an office desk with out informing the desk's owner that they are there. Being a desk rabbit can have many benefits, one can listen into office gossip, find out who the boss is going to fire next or even look up the secretary's skirt.

Moss: Roy's stuck underneath a lady's desk.

Jen: What, still?

Moss: Look, I know that normally this would be very funny but he's been under there too long for a reasonable explanation. If that woman looks down shes going to assume he's a desk rabbit.

by Poor Leno July 24, 2008

Desk Flop

The Act of whipping ones Shlong out onto his desk while class is in session.

As Mrs. Sheomacker was giving her Safety in the classroom lesson, Jeffrey interupted her by whipping out his massive Cock and planting it on his desk. To what we now know is a "desk flop."

by Yolo Frodo February 16, 2014

desk envy

Desk envy: A new employee notices the strikingly visible and well-proportioned desk of a manager or senior executive immediately recognising it as the superior counterpart of his or her own little desk and from then on he or she is subject to desk envy. They have seen it, knowing that they do not have it, and want it.

Symptoms:
In desk-dominated organizations, patients displaying the symptoms of desk envy express a wish to take possession of a larger desk at any cost. Management within these organizations have learned to use this uncontrollable urge for a large desk as a motivational tool and have started introducing a variety of desk sizes within the office, while keeping the largest desks for themselves. To paraphrase Jean Cournot the thing about which there is most consensus in this world, much more than the notion of common sense, is the difference between desk sizes. Recent research has empirically shown that emphasizing the difference in desk size can become fatal to an organization.

Treatment: The cure is very simple by keeping all the desks the same size the organization will avoid desk envy. Care however should be taken not to make the desks too small as this might lead to a desk inferiority complex. Patients who suffer from a desk inferiority complex might catch, while visiting other companies, office envy.

Our company president suffered terribly from desk envy, he always wanted to have the largest desk in the organization. When he retired his desk filled the whole room so he had to move in and out of his room through the window.

by WorkVitamins March 13, 2008

desk yoke

Derived from Italy.

Means I do believe in fairies.

Bob- "I do believe in fairies"

George- "I desk yoke too! I swear I saw one yesterday"

by Oliver Pellegrino April 4, 2011

desk diving

A term used in the watch collecting community to refer to scuffs, scratches, and wear to a watches bracelet received while sitting at an office desk. These marks are considered normal wear and tear and are usually received while typing as the bracelet rubs the desk. The term comes from the popularity of diving watches that are worn not for diving purposes, but for aesthetic ones in the office.

This watch looks brand new except for some desk diving marks on the bracelet.

by watchguy23 October 29, 2008