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apostophe 

The most butchered punctuation mark in the English language. Apostrophes are used
1) to
indicate contractions,
2) to indicate possession (in some cases), and
3) VERY occasionally to denote a plural (where otherwise the meaning of the sentence would be unclear).

The use of an apostrophe in the contraction "it's", (which means "it is"), but not in "its", (which is a possessive) causes problems for many people who didn't pass third grade.
Incorrect: Screw you moran's. Go USA.
Incorrect: Its raining cat's and dog's.
Incorrect: Here come's the train. Grab it's cargo.

Correct: Don't go in that room.
Correct: The cat's litter box is dirty.
Correct: Mind your p's and q's.
(the above is one of the ONLY CORRECT USES OF AN APOSTROPHE TO DENOTE A PLURAL. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IF YOU'RE UNSURE, JUST LEAVE THE APOSTROPHE OUT.)
apostophe by supaDISC February 24, 2005
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apostrophe crime 

What you say when you see one of the most heinous crimes against the english language known to man. It's when an apostrophe is put in a plural noun (WHERE IT DOESN'T BELONG!), therefore indicating that the noun somehow owns something...
sign: BOOK'S FOR SALE!
my smart friend: SHEILD YOUR EYES! APOSTROPHE CRIME!
me: *smacks forehead* So... that book owns a for sale? That's interesting... MY GOD PEOPLE WHEN WILL YOU LEARN!?!?

grocer's apostrophe 

A punctuation mark used to create a plural by grocers on blackboards, despite being unnecessary for the rest of the population.
Apple's 70p per pound

Special offer on raspberrie's and and banana's

The grocer's apostrophe can be also be used in other situation's by tho'se who don't know any better

alien apostrophe 

the use of an apostrophe in the naming of aliens in science fiction. Extremely prevalent in turning a common name into an alien-esque name.
Author: "hmm. I need a name for this alien in my book"

Friend: "How about... Jon?"

Author: "No. I will use J'on!"

Friend: "Ah, the use of the alien apostrophe, like Kal'el, Jor'el, Teal'c, Bra'tac, D'on...
alien apostrophe by srav May 3, 2009

Apostaphobia 

Dislike or prejudice against a person or persons for leaving a religion, especially Islam.
‘Apostaphobia is a huge problem for ex-Muslims in the west.’
Apostaphobia by Perskeptive November 15, 2018

apostrophitis 

the epidemic tendency to insert apostrophes where they do not belong
Eric has a bad case of apostrophitis- he keeps writing things like, "GREAT DEAL'S ON EVERYTHING" and "Available in 12 color's" and "He gave it back to it's owner".
apostrophitis by bethidee April 13, 2008

Fantasy Apostrophe 

The needless insertion of a silent apostrophe into a place, race or character name in a work of fantasy fiction. The fantasy apostrophe is intended to give mystique and gravitas to an otherwise stupid sounding made-up name. However, it is not always successful in this regard.

See also: Heavy Metal Umlaut
Tom - What you reading, Geoff?
Geoff - I've just started the G'dorf Trilogy
Tom - Any good?
Geoff - Well, there's this dude called Kar'El, a J'olara trader from the Ava'pia region. He's got to get an amazing S'word which will kill all his enemies, the Z'Goff.
Tom - Fantasy Apostrophe overload?
Geoff - Lucky I didn't mention the B'Z'or'ef
Fantasy Apostrophe by tomh2 December 1, 2010
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Brent: he just tossed me a slop grenade
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After we broke up, he was floxi to me.
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New York and everyone from there can fornicate themselves with an iron stick.
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Respectfully 

Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.
Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.

After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.
Respectfully by john quan the first December 20, 2020
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You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

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Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

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crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
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