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Roth Vantage's definitions

Hairy Potter

The act of sticking a broomstick up your ass and then running around with it while holding your erect cock with both of your hands.

For extra points, urinate profusely while doing it.
Look, Larry's doing a Hairy Potter again!
by Roth Vantage September 23, 2015
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Mercury

That was the car I was drivin' that day, y'know. Had a lotta cars. Yeah, different kinds... Lotta different kinds of cars...

She was standing, this girl, on the side of the street where there was this chicken stand, wasn't the Colonel, but it was a chicken stand nevertheless. And, uh, I pulled the Mercury right up alongside her and rolled down the window, you see, by electric power. And, uh, she had this leather skirt on. And, she had a lot of hair on her arms. I like that, I like that a lot, that means a big bush. I like a big bush, y'know.

So, she says, uh, "Are you dating?", y'know? I said, "Sure". So, she gets in and we pull off into this, uh, y'know, remote location, you know, that was comfortable for both she and I, and she says to me, "How much do you wanna spend?", and I said, "Whatever it takes to see that bush of yours, 'cause I know it's a big one", and she says to me, "Twenty five dollars". Hm. That's not chicken feed, y'know, to a... working man. So, I produce the $25, she sticks it down into her shoe, pulls up her skirt... and there, before me, lay this thin, crooked, uncircumcised penis. Pfff.
by Roth Vantage July 4, 2021
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play with your prick

1. To masturbate
2. To procrastinate; waste time; do nothing

Synonyms: jerk off
What are you gonna do, play with your prick for another 30 years?
by Roth Vantage October 26, 2014
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Ghetto porridge

Saltine crackers crushed into ramen broth, then stirred together.
Leroy wasn't feeling full after his bowl of instant noodles, so he crushed some crackers into the soup to make himself some ghetto porridge.
by Roth Vantage November 11, 2018
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Ruby Ridge

When you ejaculate so hard during sex that the semen shoots through the condom and impregnates the woman.

An allusion to the killing of Vicki Weaver when the bullet went through the door (a barrier) and hit her, during the Ruby Ridge incident.
I did a Ruby Ridge on Brenda, so now I gotta pay child support. Dammit.
by Roth Vantage June 8, 2016
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pedoglasses

Creepy-looking glasses worn by sexual deviants and other types of undesirables, typically characterized as double-bridged with large, shiny lenses and steel frames, often modeled as aviator eyeglasses. Most wearers of these glasses should be avoided at all costs.
Watch out for any man characterized by the following:

1. Disheveled hair
2. Unkempt stubble and/or moustache
3. Tan windbreaker
4. Pedoglasses
by Roth Vantage March 31, 2015
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Park drinker

A guy (occasionally a woman) who regularly drinks alcohol in public parks. Often seen in small groups sitting on a park bench, holding a 40 wrapped in a paper bag. May or may not be homeless.
I was jogging at the park today when I saw a bunch of park drinkers get in a fight.
by Roth Vantage March 13, 2016
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