wank widow 

A woman whose husband no longer finds her sexually attractive, no longer desires to sleep with her and instead spends his free time whacking off to porn.

Jill: Kelly always seems so unhappy anymore. What's going on with her?

Jane: That poor girl's a wank widow. Bob never gives her any attention anymore. Spends all his time on the computer.

wank widow by I'm Pseudonym February 28, 2011

Wank Window 

The length of time you wife/girlfriend is out shopping, getting hair done etc that you have to indulge in a bit of me time.

Right, thats the missus away out for an hour, lets get the porn stash out, i have a good 'Wank Window' to get the deed done

Wank Window by Niall Reid January 5, 2008

Wank Window 

A wank window is limited time frame in which an opportunistic married man is alone in his home and can therefore peruse 'performing art' videos on the home computer whilst digitally stimulating his phallus. Mission control usually grants wank windows when the wife has gone to Tesco with the kids to do the shopping / gone to see relatives / went out with her mates. Wank windows are known to be tenuous and unpredictable because the wife may return early and the act of self flagellation may have to be aborted.

Courier: I tried to deliver the parcel to number 8 this morning but the bloke wouldn't answer the door. I rang the bell repeatedly but he appeared to be glued to his computer in the front room, ignorant twat!
Boss: How'd he look?
Courier: Funnily enough he was sweating, red faced and seemed utterly focused elsewhere.

Boss: Son, a man's wank window is sacred. When you're married you'll understand.

Wank Window by TheFoolOnTheHillAnarchy October 20, 2012

window wank 

To wank proudly out of an open window and ejaculate onto the road or stunned passers by.

Bonus points for maintaining eye contact with a neighbour while slap boxing the one eyed champ!!

I'm in a rather dirty mood tonight Claude, infact I'm going to have a quick window wank. Should I ever need an alibi I'm pretty sure the neighbours will remember.

window wank by Lardy croft fridge raider June 14, 2015

Window wank of faith

The act of jerking off outside a window whilst crying as the person commiting the act has come to terms with the fact that they are a pathetic welp of person who looks up vaguely sexual terms on Urban Dictionary to get a hard on, only to quickly be struck with the epiphany that they are wasting the precious life they have been endowed with, and the person you could have been has been burnt into nothingness by your abhorrent choices in life, and you are just the abysmal shell of what could have been a potentially good human being.

my name jeff

also, stop looking up shit like window wank of faith and do something productive for once you cognitively inept mongrel.

Window wank of faith by GetPrankedFaggo April 3, 2017