A Stage Hand is someone who lacks real acting ability, yet still wants to be part of a stage production. Usually drama dropouts if you will, they do not appreciate the art or talent of actors.
A person who makes the impossible possible, usually in stupid yet functional ways. They also have to fix everything the actors break. For further information see ninja
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'