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spliffness

the ability to quickly roll a spliff.
your quickness is directly related to your spliffness.
Maggie: Wow Greg, your spliffness is amazing!
Greg: Listen Struggles, my spliffness is no match for yours!!
by RyanGregMaggie May 19, 2010
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jahova's stiffness

An unwanted erection that surprises you at work, school, disney land, or any other public place. Not to be confused with a jahova's witness. (the annoying bastards that also surprise you and try to give you little bibles with pictures in them to make them more fun to look at, and not read)
Dude, i got jahova's stiffness at disney world when i got on the Peter Pan Ride.
by joe joe the circus clown November 8, 2009
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Jehovah's Splitness

The only real way you can deal with a JW that is a member of your family. No matter what you say you cannot convince them that they a working for an enormous tax dodge publishing empire based in NYC.

In return they have to stay away from you once you make it clear you think their beliefs are beyond whacky.

The result - you don't see each other, but you still get to go to all the fun things like birthdays etc without that freak being there. Win!
Bob: Hey, is that your brother in law? Lets go say hi.

Adam: Nah man, he's a JW, we are keeping our distance.

Bob: Sounds like some serious Jehovah's Splitness there bro?

Adam: Damn right, it's awesome.
by Witness the Fitness April 8, 2010
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Jehovah's stiffness

n. An unwelcome erection which arrives at the most inconvenient times and is hard to get rid of.
E.g. Yo Tony blud, lessons over, lets split.

Tony: Shit! I can't stand up, I got Jehovah's stiffness init!
by swany01 May 14, 2008
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travel stiffness

The unconscious act of Male arousal through the monotonous motion of a motorised vehicle or The vibration of the motor felt though the seat of the vehicle.
The vibration from the motor of the bus gave Gabriel a case of travel stiffness.
by Bubbles91 October 20, 2015
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spiffyness

An extention of the word spiffy. Which is used to desribe something exceptionally fantastic.

The act of being spiffy.
"I'm going to New York for my birthday."

And you say, "Spiffyness."
by Antigone February 28, 2005
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Jehovah's Stiffness

A Jehovah's Stiffness is a completely unwanted erection that appears at the worst of all times and once it appears, it absolutely refuses to go away for a VERY long time.

In reference to a Jehovah's Witness
For example getting a Jehovah's Stiffness on the bus or train just before your stop and you have to stand up and walk away but you know you can't is really annoying
by Stu Marble December 23, 2007
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