sphinctermeter 

The part of the anus that manages the delicate flow of waste which differentiates and carefully selects what shall pass based on it's current state - whether it be in solid, liquid or gas form. This phenomenal muscle is highly used when diarrhea is present and the person is unsure if there is a liquid or gas eager to exit from the anus. In many instances it allows gas to expel while delicately holding back a tsunami of molten fecal matter. During moments of constipation however it remains unused.

Josh: Dude the other day I was at the movies and I had some major diarrhea. Luckily my sphinctermeter let me release gas from my bowels while keeping back the mother load of explosive goo.

William: Dude that's disgusting. Did you eat something bad?

Josh: Your wife's chili.

sphinctermeter by Dirty Burrito February 9, 2019

sphinctometer 

1. A device for measuring the degree to which one is an asshole.

2. A device for measuring the degree to which one is full of shit.

"Wow, Buck, that story just sent the sphinctometer needle into the brown!"

sphinctometer by biggs33 December 9, 2008

sphincterbater

A sphincterbater although sometimes female, is usually a male of homosexual preferences that gets a feeling of exctasy out of fingering their own anus.

MrPhat was caught by his mother sphincterbating the other night.

sphincterbater by ZEN 1 March 1, 2005

sphingtermeter

a unit of measurement, for measuring small annoying things.

Dam! I missed that shot by a sphingtermeter!

sphingtermeter by crack whore July 17, 2007

jerb 

well known from south park
rednecks get angrry that future folk took there jobs so they yell
They took ouare jerbs!

Them future folk took ouare jerbs!

jerb by Jimberley Kim April 7, 2005

Cheeks 

An Irish phrase meaning shit, derived from ass
(Not to be confused with the literal description of one's buttocks)

"Did you hear the song Aylek$ dropped?"
"Hardly. Her music is absolute cheeks."

"My boyfriend say LaFlame is cheeks."
"Tell your boyfriend I said it's his mixtape that's cheeks."

Cheeks by thecartisan April 26, 2020

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility

I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.

sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019