premature ebonkulation

To sell one's entire dogebonk crypto currency portfolio (usually at a loss) at the start of a dip in the market which then later recovers. Meaning you have to buy back in at a loss (so you've lost twice) . It's a real embarrassment, similar to that of ejaculating prematurely when you see the downward curve of a ladies titties. You've made a mess of the sheets, embarrassed yourself and you didn't get to have sex. With premature ebonkulation everyone knows you did it though because they can see your wallet transaction history.

Man, did you see that whale blew his entire stack at the start of the dip? He bought back in later at a loss, the Muppet! - that was some serious premature ebonkulation.

by dogebonker69 November 26, 2021

premature ebakulation

Medical condition that fans of University of Miami football suffer from each year, when they believe the team is "bak" to their 2001 form.

Premaure ebakulations lasting longer than 6 weeks will result in a mid-season Nolegasm at the hands of FSU.

Fan of da U: We bak! We got swag and U dna!
Every other ACC fan: You're suffering from premature ebakulation. I'll prescribe you one dose of reality.

by cccccchris January 2, 2014

Premature ejokulation

The act of laughing at your own joke prior to delivering the punch line.

david letterman committed premature ejokulation last night.

dude thinks his jokes are so funny he prematurely ejokulates.

by spencedog April 11, 2009

premature erockulation

The condition created when a local band's self perceived popularity exceeds it's actual popularity.

Did you see the band at the bar last night? Their lead singer really has premature erockulation. Who the hell were they anyway?

by Vanhinely November 7, 2006

premature ejockulation

Living out your unaccomplished goals of being a sports superstar by forcing your children to play sports they are either too young to play or suck at playing.

I love Jim and Jenny to death, but little Timmy has no business being out on that field. This is a classic case of premature ejockulation.

by Dr. Tanglewood March 19, 2015

Premature Ejokulation

Attempting to make a joke before all the key parts that are necessary to make the joke funny are there; often with the hope that the missing parts will form by the time they are required.

Person 1: That was uncool.
Person 2: What's uncool is your... ... um... damn, premature ejokulation.

by dh718 March 26, 2010