newsela

some gay ass website we are forced to do bc of school. it is fucking torture.

person 1: oh shit i have newsela tonight!
person 2: suck 2 b u!

by teachers are gay April 17, 2020

Newsflash

A word commonly used to point out the obvious.

Newsflash: Getting shot hurts!

by Bas May 26, 2005

Newslandia

A discord server seeking independence

Newslandia is the most amazing micro-nation server ever.

by SovietMapping May 10, 2021

newsflash: i don't care

A moderately unkind smart-ass thing to say to someone who says something that doesn't matter. Most people who say this are either in a bad mood, not a nice person altogether, or don't like the person they're talking to. It's not very clever, but alot of people thing it is.

Bill: Hey my cat threw up today.
Joe: Newsflash: I don't care!

by Diana Stephens May 23, 2005

newseless

the unvaluable, unfunctional or generally USELESS nature of a person, object or action that is NEW

Our company just hired this overpriced executive and he's fucking newseless.

I bought these scissors yesterday and they don't cut shit.....newseless.

by Rocky Dennis March 3, 2010

Newsplaining

Explanations provided by the Mainstream Media that fits into their agenda setting narrative.

High school kid in a MAGA hat smirks at a hostile Native American man who approached him and beat a drum in his face. The mainstream media uses newsplaining to tell Americans how racist the kid is.

by Bubb Rubb 21 February 6, 2019

Newsflash

Everybody is a follower! So how can you people claim to be right or correct?

Here’s a newsflash for you stupid shits

by Zatarain’s Root Beer Drinker April 27, 2021