Mastrubating 

I know youve done it before... Fucking pervert.

I like mastrubating to porn.

Mastrubating by fuckingadults September 23, 2021

scottish mastrubating

Peeing, pooping, vomiting and having an orgasm at the same time.

Men cannot do more than one thing at the same time? Nonsense, try scottish mastrubating!

scottish mastrubating by idgafosoae December 11, 2016

No mastrubating March 

You can’t mastrubating whole month it is like no nut November but with mastrubating and girls needs to participat

Girl:yo I will go mastrubating home

Boy: no you can’t

Girl:why
It’s no mastrubating march

No mastrubating March by Krapālis November 17, 2019

masturbating to the dictionary 

A phrase used as a comeback to a Grammar Nazi or to someone who says “grammar is sexy” during a conversation. It can be used in any situation to respond to someone who tries to shame you on your grammar.

i.e.
txt msg exchange
Timmy: Yo Jake, you wanna come over to Jason’s place to smoke after school? Meghan and Jill are coming over and I’m sure your have a dope time with us.
Jake: You mean *you’ll have a dope time.
Timmy: Dude, are you masturbating to the dictionary at your house? Don’t be such a Grammar Nazi.

Lucy: Hey Jamie, do you think Alex is doing good today after the party last night? You think he’s interested in hanging out later?
Jamie: You mean, doing WELL after the party…? Damn Lucy, grammar is sexy just an fyi.
Lucy: Wtf Jamie, when did you start masturbating to the dictionary?

masturbating to the dictionary by runninghighkid August 4, 2018

Manstruating 

When a male is going through a period of increased irritability and moodiness.

Geez, Jermaine, what's up with HB? He's been so pissy lately. He must be manstruating. Give him a manpon.

Manstruating by Pucas Leters April 15, 2008

masturbating

What you're doing when using urban dictionary.

I'm masturbating.

masturbating by ccthz January 27, 2021

furiously masturbating 

A type of masturbating practiced by reclusives who fear that their masturbatory time may be limited.

This is generally not the case, giving furious masterbaters a proclivity to masturbate a lot.

Instead of playing beer pong and sleazing on grimbos, Alex spent the night in his room, furiously masturbating.

furiously masturbating by AXAdartmouth April 16, 2009