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mascurbation

eating while you masturbate.
"Mascurbation is ok only when you are eating healthy."
by fgdsfsfsfgdsfgdssfgds April 15, 2008
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masturbating to the dictionary

A phrase used as a comeback to a Grammar Nazi or to someone who says “grammar is sexy” during a conversation. It can be used in any situation to respond to someone who tries to shame you on your grammar.
i.e.
txt msg exchange
Timmy: Yo Jake, you wanna come over to Jason’s place to smoke after school? Meghan and Jill are coming over and I’m sure your have a dope time with us.
Jake: You mean *you’ll have a dope time.
Timmy: Dude, are you masturbating to the dictionary at your house? Don’t be such a Grammar Nazi.

Lucy: Hey Jamie, do you think Alex is doing good today after the party last night? You think he’s interested in hanging out later?
Jamie: You mean, doing WELL after the party…? Damn Lucy, grammar is sexy just an fyi.
Lucy: Wtf Jamie, when did you start masturbating to the dictionary?
by runninghighkid August 4, 2018
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Comedic Masturbation

When you are so funny by yourself that you laugh out loud without any participation by a partner.

Progresses from a small grin to a smile to a quiet giggle and then quickly reaches the climactic event of an audible belly laugh, or LOL. Following climax, tissue is often used to dry resulting wetness occuring in the ocular region.
My humor is not always understood by others and I frequently find myself involuntarily engaging in comedic masturbation.
by K-Rista-Raaah July 22, 2016
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Bureaucratic Masturbation

noun - 1. Engaging in any activity for the sake of making one feel better about themselves, their organization, or their company without actually accomplishing anything. 2. Holding meetings to provide recommendations only to have management do what they wanted in the first place. 3. Holding special work group meetings to make the 'little people' feel ownership, when the decision has already been made by higher levels of management.
My boss has picked me to suffer through more Bureaucratic Masturbation, representing the department on a policy work group.
I spent the last 3 months researching the best candidate for the position and the Boss picked his pet employee anyway. God I hat Bureaucratic Masturbation!
by Bill Koogler January 17, 2008
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Masturbation guilt

The sense of guilt you feel post-masturbation when you realized what you have just jerked yourself off to.
"Oh God, what have I done? I did not just masturbate to bestiality.. talk about masturbation guilt.
by GunaDK January 19, 2012
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Mathurbation

After engaging in mutual mathurbation, Johnny and Sally walked away laughing with many equations in hand.
by MATHCAMP09 July 31, 2009
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Public Masturbation

I definitely should not have participated in Public masturbation on that subway.
by thepseudonymousbosch February 21, 2017
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