This is generally performed by a maiden for a gentleman, however, roles may be reversed. Similar to a lap dance, a woman jives on a man's lap. Here's the catch--the small difference is that the job giver and receiver are naked. #pantsless #pleasurable #crotchsaddle
Alone and naked, Gerald and June got hot and bothered while listening to Jack Johnson. June mounted Gerald as he asked her for a lap job. Five minutes later, the neighbors know her name.
When a woman (preferably a dancer/stripper) gives you a lapdance without your pants on. This lapdance must be so well executed that you, in fact, cum all over the inside of her thighs. Then, you pour cocaine all over the semen and then make the woman snort the cocaine/semen mixture from her thigh area.
Not to be confused with a lapdance and subsequent blowjob.
I paid a Chinese hooker300 dollars to perform a lapjob blowdance last night for me. She told me I had to supply the blow. About 40 minutes in, she had a stroke and died. The quality of strippers around here is getting really bad.
when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.
This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.
FRIEND A: "Did you just take a stealthie of me?"
FRIEND B (turning phone around): "no I was just using snapchat's new filter, see?"