Skip to main content

The IMPEDE Continuum 

A theory which states that a universe is created from sheer awesomeness and the awesomeness which creates a universe radiates from someone with sheer awesomeness. The awesomeness obstructs any other force which can potentially create life or the like - Hence, it is called the "IMPEDE Continuum". (FYI, if you don't know, Impede means to obstruct.) In other words, awesomeness created the universe and everything else was created by China. Awesome right?
Person 1: Guess what?
Person 2: What?
Person 1: Totally did something awesome.
Person 2: And that was...?
Person 1: I created this theory about how awesomeness can create a universe. I called it "The IMPEDE Continuum"

<Explains The IMPEDE Continuum>

Person 1: Awesome right?
Person 2: Awesome....

<awkward silence>

Person 2: I wonder what kind of universe just got created...

impedophile 

a)someone who enjoys barring progress in any given endeavor.
b)a person who takes pleasure in deliberate inadequate miss-communication creating confusion and impeding progress particularly in work situations.
c) a Play on words to suggest someone who causes confusion also is involved in boy molestation, by way of an insult in (bad taste).
Steve: Hey Tbag you god damned Impedophile stop getting in my way.
Tariq : *muffled* quiet you

Leeroy: (just finishing counting through thousands of cans in inventory taking) 3495, 3496, 3497, threeth.....

Tariq: 12, 49673, 3, 456, 86 *perverted smirk*
impedophile by Labtekape April 28, 2010

poultry impediment 

the politically correct term to define an individual intentionally or unintentionally sabotaging your advances with a female
I was unsuccessful in courting that attractive female last night all because this one poultry impediment wouldn't leave me alone

text impediment 

Texting the wrong word or wrong letter within the word, creating a different meaning. Usually occurs from texting too quickly or due to an altered mental state.
Girl: I'm taking pictures of the waterfall you will love. They're wonderflu!

Boy: I just got over a bad case of wonderflu myself.

Girl: You're a bully. Making fun of little kids with text impediments.
text impediment by Two D's August 6, 2009

impudence 

The quality, state, or an instance of being insulting or grossly lacking in respect.
Girl 1> Your outfit is whack.
Girl 2> First of all don't ever say whack (you can't pull it off) and second of all your impudence means nothing coming from a stuck up hoe like yourself.
impudence by Fara April 9, 2004

Impenetrable

1. Impossible to get in or through: Not able to be passed through or entered.

2. Incomprehensible: Impossible to understand or discern.

3. Closed to influence: Not open to intellectual or moral influences, impressions, or ideas.
1. The woods formed an impenetrable barrier.
2. An impenetrable legal jargon.
Impenetrable by Jafje April 5, 2007