cloutness 

(noun) The quality of being influential; influence.

Origin: clout + ness

A marketing agency measures the cloutness of content creators to see how much influence they have on social media.

cloutness by Joswin April 6, 2017

Countess Boochie Flagrante 

The alter ego responsible for anything bad you were caught doing. Originally a meme based on a Tumblr user that claimed "Eminem isn't violent, Slim Shady is," and the response "im robbing a bank tomorrow and when the cops come for me imma tell them it was my alter ego countess boochie flagrante," it is now used for any time someone tries a "that isn't really who I am" excuse.

Person: "I'm sorry about that videoed incident of me screaming racial slurs at minorities! I just want you to know, that does not represent the sort of person I am."

Everyone Else: "Yeah, sure - it wasn't you, it was your alter ego, Countess Boochie Flagrante."

Person: "I'm sorry I fucked your husband and then, when when the affair became public, spread terrible rumors about you so that I'd look like less of a homewrecker. I want you to know, that's not who I really am."

Wife: "Ah yes! You didn't tell the neighborhood I was a bipolar valium addict, it was your famous alter-ego Countess Boochie Flagrante."

Person: "I'm sorry for embezzling from that children's charity! That's not who I really am!"

Everyone Else: "Countess Boochie Flagrante strikes again!"

Countess Boochie Flagrante by Mai Ainsel November 6, 2019

artificial closeness 

Artificial closeness is when people who you just met in a short amount of time will trauma dump or will speak about deep and personal stuff to get close to you. When in reality you know nothing about each other.

People do this so they can information out of you;
or they want to speedrun the friend/relationship,
or they're extremely self-destructive.

This is toxic because there is no foundation to the friend/relationship, making it unstable.

"You cockblocked yourself for trying the 'artificial closeness' strategy"

"Anne is artificially close with Drake, that manipulative slag has no chance."

artificial closeness by i'msohungry3466 April 8, 2022

cloudless 

Someone who either refuses to or can't figure out how to use "The Cloud".

Dave: I'm having so much trouble storing pictures on these floppy discs.
Jay: Why don't you store them in the cloud?
Dave: They might get wet.
Jay: Damn, you're cloudless and clueless.

cloudless by Your Eminence December 15, 2014

Cleatness

the studs that make the difference between a tennis shoe and cleat

I cant wear these cleats to school it'll wear out the cleatness

Cleatness by Icantthinkofandorginalname October 24, 2006

cloutiest 

Cloutiest: (Adj) Having the most clout.

See Clout

Those glasses are the cloutiest glasses I have ever seen.

cloutiest by Muffinn123435246 October 13, 2017

cloutweasleys 

she is kinda funny i suppose. she is also sometimes nice. also i have a crush on her lolz.

"i am in love with sheils aka cloutweasleys"
"no one cares lol"

cloutweasleys by andromeda tonks October 24, 2020