bitchmarks

The metric by which your wife or life partner assesses your progress in helping around the house.

I guess watching television for several hours a day doesn't meet my wife's bitchmarks for my performance in the house.

by Cynicool April 21, 2020

benchmarks

1. A reference mark that something is measured against. The original benchmarks are places on the workbench used to measure common lengths of material, such as lumber.

2. In surveying, a "bench mark" (two words) is a post or other permanent mark established at a known elevation that is used as the basis for measuring the elevation of other topographical points.

In computer and Internet technology, the term may have any of these meanings:

1) A set of conditions against which a product or system is measured. PC magazine laboratories frequently test and compare several new computers or computer devices against the same set of application programs, user interactions, and contextual situations. The total context against which all products are measured and compared is referred to as the benchmark.

2) A program that is specially designed to provide measurements for a particular operating system or application.

3) A known product with which users are familiar or accustomed to that other newer products can be compared to.

4) A set of performance criteria which a product is expected to meet.

Laboratory benchmarks sometimes fail to reflect real-world product use. For this reason, Eric Raymond defines a benchmark as "an inaccurate measure of computer performance" and cites the "old hacker's saying" that "In the computer industry, there are three kinds of lies: lies, damn lies, and benchmarks."

Still, benchmarks can be useful and some companies offer benchmark programs for downloading or a benchmark testing service on their own site.

by Athene Airheart March 18, 2004

Bitchmark

-verb: sleeping with a teacher or professor with the apparent intent of getting a better mark on a paper or exam. When student-initiated, often orchestrated with the same cunning characteristic of the Machiavellian German statesman Otto von Bismarck.

Kaz: How did Lucida do so well on her economics test?
Harmony: Oh, she fully bitchmarked Mr Jones.
Kaz: Makes sense. She's scheming like that.
Harmony: Ya, and hot.

OR

Ms Tululia: Hey Armand, wanna bitchmark tonight? I'll give you 100 on your IB extended essay.
Armand: Um, you're 60 years old, woman, but ya, I'll bitchmark, I need the marks, bitch.

by Jorgitooo February 9, 2009

merry bitchmas

Roman’s rant to Logan in Sander Sides

”You must be sandersclaus an a Merry bitchmas to you,”

by Glitchie Michie August 29, 2020

benchmarks

Tests that require fiercest analysis of a system.

That AMD Benchmarked faster than the Pentium 4.

by A student March 23, 2004

Bitchmaker

An alpha female that intentionally or unintentionally turns a beta male into her bitch. It usually occurs when a guy is attracted to the woman, but she is not attracted to him except as “just a friend”. In this situation if the woman asks the man to do a favor for her he will be glad to do it because he is still attracted to her. The woman continues to ask him to do more and more “favors” for her and he eventually basically becomes her lackey or her bitch. This is a very beneficial situation for the woman because she can use him to do things like running errands or waxing her car, but she is doesn’t have to do anything for him.

Girl 1: That guy follows Niranjana around like a puppy and does anything she says. What’s up with that?

Girl 2: Niranjana is a bitchmaker and he is one of her bitches.

by Mr. Bickle August 31, 2010

benchmarks

Perfonmance Tests

This Computer's 3D Benchmarks Rules!

by Comando Gruya March 19, 2004