amish hand job

An Amish hand job is when your partner uses their non dominant hand to perform. The result is a clumsy, sloppy, poorly gripped job such as an Amish person would give as they don’t know what they are doing.

“I’m so frustrated. I asked my wife for a hand job and she was not into it. She used her left hand so she could lay on her stomach and go to sleep. Felt like an Amish hand job.”

amish hand job by Skilled sailor June 24, 2025

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Amish Handjob

The act of using two wooden spoons, liberally spread with churned butter, to beat one's self or others off in an aggressive manner.

Went out last night looking for sex, but I settled for an Amish Handjob.

Amish Handjob by theanonymousamish December 23, 2018

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Amish Handjob

A luxurious smooth hand rub that is marked by butter churning level rubbing.

Erin gave a mean Amish Handjob and I melted in the bed like butter.

Amish Handjob by TippyDippy85 June 30, 2020

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amish handjob

A handjob that is given overhanded so that the thumb is closest to the balls. It reminds one of being Amish and working a butterchurner.

You know, Clause if you ever get bored of giving yourself the Stranger you could give yourself an Amish Handjob!

amish handjob by Mary Booker June 20, 2008

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Utility beer

Utility beer is the beer you keep around for the day-to-day moments when beer is a necessity to assist in pedestrian activities (golf, plumbing, yardwork, babysitting, staff meetings, Zoom calls). For the beer snob it is the beer you save for neighbors when they drop in at 3 p.m. on a Tuesday. It is differentiated from the actual high-end beer you save for special events, holidays, and special tastings.

Person 1: Dave, did you bring along those hazy craft IPA's so we could drink while cleaning Lyle's pool?
Person 2: Nope. I just have a bunch of utility beer that Steve dumped on me. Good enough for this. It is only 10:30 a.m.

Utility beer by lakeshore February 1, 2022

Word of the Day on August 10, 2026

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Oinking

Police activity, especially of the non-productive type i.e. The act of setting up and patrolling speed traps, harassing or arresting people based on appearance (racial profiling), breaking up parties, any sort of cannabis bust, etc.

"Did you see all the cops on highway 6? They are oinking hard!"

"I hope Johnny doesn't get caught with his bag of weed, the pigs are oinking"

Oinking by DontDrinkSoda June 29, 2013

Word of the Day on August 9, 2026

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Hopeslop

A video or picture depicting an unrealistic scenario that is often seen as hopeful but in reality, is unrealistic or otherwise rare in real life.

"0/10 hopeslop"

Hopeslop by rawmilkconsumer69 July 13, 2026

Word of the Day on August 8, 2026

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