Turdament
A rest room encounter in which two stalled bathroom attendees are both faced with a desire to NOT beat the opposing attendee to the finish line (often called the flush line).
The courteous stall attendee will wait for the opposing, earlier arriving squat jockey to flush before making his/or her pioneering lunge towards the flush line. This thankfully prevents said lunge from becoming recognizable by two of the five senses of the unwitting number two participant.
A rare phenomenon called a Turdament occurs when neither stalwart bung vendor have had a chance to advance their cause. Both sit in incommodious silence while their equally taciturn cube mate continues to clinch harder than a vice grip.
The Turdament winner is crowned with the crapshooter who is able to hold out longer than a fat chick at a salad bar, and more importantly, their opponent.
The courteous stall attendee will wait for the opposing, earlier arriving squat jockey to flush before making his/or her pioneering lunge towards the flush line. This thankfully prevents said lunge from becoming recognizable by two of the five senses of the unwitting number two participant.
A rare phenomenon called a Turdament occurs when neither stalwart bung vendor have had a chance to advance their cause. Both sit in incommodious silence while their equally taciturn cube mate continues to clinch harder than a vice grip.
The Turdament winner is crowned with the crapshooter who is able to hold out longer than a fat chick at a salad bar, and more importantly, their opponent.
Hey Tim, you'll never believe how long I had to sit and wait before I won a Turdament today. My lower intestine was more uncomfortable than a lengthy pelvic examination performed by a man with two wooden hands.
Turdament by unitedstains September 12, 2013
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