The Excuse 

Diarrhea. It will get you out of anything, including high school classes. No one will argue with you, or question you further.

(a teacher and a student)

T: I'm going to write you up for skipping my class again!

S (in a hushed voice, The Excuse): ummmm....I couldn't get off the toilet...I had diarrhea...

T: um...

(at this point the teacher dosn't want to listen anymore, and pretends to be busy. you walk away in sucess)

The Excuse by Adam Kelly October 27, 2005

the Excuse me gene 

the gene that causes a person to involuntarily say excuse me in any situation.This gene was discovered in John Mikzsa.

"Excuse me that is my wife."

the Excuse me gene by jim April 30, 2004

Excuse The Fuck 

A simple reaction that describes only question and disgust.

(Warning there were real quotes)
“One time I accidentally nutted in my eye”

“Excuse the fuck”

“You people make me wish I was uncircumcised”
“EXCUSE THE FUCK?!?”

Excuse The Fuck by @W01 October 27, 2020

End of the World Excuse 

An excuse used to justify things that would only be made right if the world were to end.

a. I maxed out my credit card and cheated on my wife because I thought the world was going to end on December 21st, 2012. Now I need and excuse better then the End of the World Excuse.

End of the World Excuse by kbates55 May 10, 2009

excuse the sexy 

A phrase given by one donning a too short and too tight hospital gown when her naughty bits are hanging out visibly.

Patient (while shimmying past nurse in doorway after putting on too tight, too short hospital gown): "Excuse the sexy."

excuse the sexy by father muskrat October 1, 2010

The Bieber excuse 

When Bieber's fans tell you that you only make fun of Bieber because you are jealous of his "success" and "talent". A majority of the time, this is a false statement.

Normal Person: I hate Justin Biever!

Stupid Eight Year Old Biever Fan: Ugh! Your only saying that because your jealous that he's so sexy!!!

Normal Person: What ever, freak! Stop using the Bieber excuse on everybody! It's not true!

The Bieber excuse by IHateBiever March 9, 2010

The Northwest Excuse 

Going past the destination/doing more than asked and thus failing to complete an objective.

Son: Mom, you forgot to pick me up.

Mom: I was on my way, but i ended up going to far and went shopping at the mall.

Son: Oh, you're just using the Northwest Excuse

The Northwest Excuse by Embarassed to be a Pilot November 2, 2009