St. Mattress

The church which allows for worship in bed. Some people may or may not pick up on the sarcasm here...

Do you belong to a church in town?
Yes, I'm a loyal member of St. Mattress.

by Sun-day May 2, 2010

St. Mattress by the Springs

Your bed on Sunday morning. Where you mattress worship.

The "Name" of the church you say you attend on Sunday morning, when the truth is that you are just sleeping in.

What you say to "friends" that want you to attend church with them and you don't want to hurt their feelings - "I attend St. Mattress by the Springs".

Bob: Hey-Wanna go to church with me? You do attend somewhere don't you?

Thom: Sorry, can't go with you, I attend St. Mattress by the Springs, but thanks anyway.

by BeezerKR May 2, 2010

St. Mattress worshipper

adj.
A person who sleeps in on Sunday morning, especially if they do so to skip church.

Jamie is a total St. Mattress worshipper.

by Koby_Fish August 17, 2007

St. Mattress

worship from bed, usually very loud "OH GOD" repeated a lot

them: religious preference?
me: st. mattress...it's very exclusive!

by thatnoodlyappendage December 31, 2011