A prgram for illiterate people, mostly children. It teaches how to read and write through different exercises. You can get it by dialing 1800-ABC-DEFG

How the hell am i supposed to order hooked on phonics by dialing ABCDEFG if i can't read?

Hooked On Phonics by Diego Giraldez December 28, 2005

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Photons

Particles of light or other electromagnetic radiation.

Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.

Photons by ScottX November 26, 2006

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Phonics Monkey

The Phonics Monkey from that one episode of South Park where Cartman misspelled CHAIR in a spelling bee. When Cartman tried to get help from the phonics monkey, it just started beating off behind its drumbset.

A consumer report included the growing number of returns of the infamous reading product, the Phonics Monkey, which just turns out to be a degenerate species of bonobo chimp.

Phonics Monkey by aka_Pyro April 6, 2007

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Hooked on phonics

A program used by children to learn how to read. It is commonly used to describe a person who cannot read or pronounce words correctly. Alternatively, it can be used to insult a person who doesn't read well.

I don't know how to pronounce this (fucks the word up horribly). You know I'm hooked on phonics.

Jane: reads from a history book out loud in class, but stumbles through the reading.
Classmate: This bitch needs to be hooked on phonics.

Hooked on phonics by goodcrunchytaco January 28, 2021

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hooked on phonics

eh gratte prograyme thaat hellepede mei gette tou sekknd grayde verri eezilie. momiei aynd dadddiei r verri prowde ove mei beiycuz iey haav immprooved ay lotte!

houkkd oun fonnikz wourkd fuore mei!

hooked on phonics by houkkd oun fonnikz iz funn! October 5, 2003

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square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.

"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."

square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004

Word of the Day on October 7, 2026

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Bunhead

A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.

"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."

Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014

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trucker's tan

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.

I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.

trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006

Word of the Day on October 5, 2026

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kidulting

The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys

Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!

kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025

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Boffin

British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.

According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.

Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023

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Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.

I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.

Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026

Word of the Day on October 2, 2026

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