Passturbation 

Masturbating in light of passing an exam/course.

YES! I DIDN'T FAIL THE GOD DAMN PHYSICS EXAM! I'M GOING TO PASSTURBATE FOR HOURS TONIGHT!!! I'm going to do some passturbation.

Passturbation by Yandereperson March 5, 2011

Passturbation 

The style of football (soccer) made popular by the Barcelona squad and Spanish national sides. This style of football is marked by a teams OCD-like need to pass the ball as many times as possible during a match; even if the pass serves no other purpose than to pad the player's stats and serve the manager's delusion that whoever passes the ball the most wins the game. This includes 1-yard sideways passes in your own half while under no pressure, passing while staring at an open net inside the box and the 40-yard backwards pass to the goalkeeper.

Person 1: Are you a Barcelona fan?

Person 2: Hell yeah. I basically bust a nut while watching that team not try and score, but instead just pass the ball around. How about you?

Person 1: Nah, I'm not a huge fan of passturbation. I like teams that can actually fuck; like Baryen Munich, for instance. Hey, didn't those two teams play each other recently?

Person 2: Uhh...Messi was hurt that day...both days....

Passturbation by fatgunnersaurus November 21, 2013

Pasturbation 

Obsessively romanticizing the past.

Mad Men is great TV, if you're into pasturbation.

Pasturbation by fraying August 31, 2010

Bassturbation 

Putting ones scrote on a large bass speaking whilst listening to a remix of any Adele song until you ejaculate.

Last night I bassturbated so hard it measured 9.7 on the richter scale.

Gerald - 'Last night, i had to bury my pet dog Gravel'
The Boss - 'What happened, Gezza?'
Gerald - 'Bassturbation'
The Boss - 'I lost my infant to that, no wait.... i stabbed him in the face, never mind'

Bassturbation by TWC.TV March 16, 2017

assturbation 

To pleasure the anal cavity of oneself with the intent of sexual gratification.

I really wanted to go down on her last night, but when I got home she was in the middle of an assturbation session to the new Justin Timberlake video.

assturbation by decamel August 28, 2013

Pabsturbation 

The act of delivering untold pleasures to one's self through the art of cracking a Pabst.

Pabsturbation can be performed alone or in groups.

Pabsturbation by Dave the King of Rock July 4, 2010

Assturbation 

Masturbation focused on pleasuring the butt, whether it be by massage or insertion.

Wow, this banana is frozen rock solid. I'm gonna have a good assturbation session tonight!

Assturbation by Twiggins Q. Neugebauer June 20, 2011