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Mortician 

Brendan is a sexy mortician
Mortician by thiskidbe October 31, 2018

mortician 

I like the band Mortician.
mortician by METAL October 18, 2003

prostitute mortician 

A person who is hired to have sex with a corpse who has wished not to die a virgin.
“The dead man needs a prostitute mortician to come in and de-flower him.”

midnight mortician 

Midnight mortician is trilogy written by the author of "dear lilac" and "smush!" , Valerie Vancouver. Midnight mortician revolves around an immortal fae named aeliana and an immortal vampire named Magnus.
Have you read midnight mortician by Valerie Vancouver?

No, I haven't

Well you should!

The dirty mortician 

You tell your partner to go and stand next to the freezer for a while, then return to the bed and act dead so that you can have intercourse. (A walk-in cooler or freezer works best!)
Tim told Autum to go cool off by the freezer so she could play dead and get the dirty mortician on!
The dirty mortician by RS THE PIG February 2, 2019

fishin' mortician 

A mortician that enjoys fishing.
That fishin' mortician over yonder works on dead people and likes to fish over at Lake Cocksucker.