Monkey spanker

A person who masterbates way too much.

Scott is the biggiest monkey spanker I no.

by Jon Simon December 15, 2002

Monkey Spanker

A Monkey Spanker is were a human spanks a monkey or ape with his hand.

Dang, that dude's a monkey Spanker.

by Savannah connars April 3, 2021

south paw monkey spanker

One who uses his left hand to jack, whack, choke the chicken, spank the monkey, attack the one-eyed purple-headed warrior or in other words, MASTURBATE!

A lefty, per say

May be a person that writes, hits, or even smokes with his right hand but gallops the old lizzard with his left hand.

Also referred to as an S.P.M.P.

Kristine: So I used my teloscope last night and looked into Ray's window. Did you know that he is a South Paw Monkey Spanker?

Derek: So I applied for this new job at the Home Depot, and my boss wanted to know if I was an S.P.M.P. and I'm all wtf? On occasion, though, I do, do the five kunckle shuffle with 'ol Lefty!

Janet: Hey Bobby?
Bobby: Yes Janet?
Janet: Do you participate in genital stimulation via phallengetic motion with your left hand?
Bobby: Why yes, I am an S.P.M.P.!

by Emas Diez May 9, 2006

money spanker

1) Derogatory British term for a foolish/idiotic/stupid person. Synonym of wanker.
2) A delicious alcoholic drink best described on BrokeAss Gourmet.

You're a fucking wanker, you money spanker!

by trojan_marxist May 4, 2009

Monkey Spunker

A monkey spunker is that special type of wanker who thinks he is it

You know that bloke dave, he's a proper monkey spunker he is.

by Sauce_Monkey October 3, 2020

spanner monkey

A largely useless individual whose only career prospects are to work in maintainence departments painting walls and replacing light-bulbs. May have questionable habits such as an excess love of porn, language that would make a soldier blush and a equally useless son.

"Why can't one of those spanner monkeys come up here to fix the lights?"

by Mr Ben February 8, 2005

Spanner Monkey

When someone has been idiotic, foolish, or incredibLy fucking stupid.

"Hey Jim! Wheres my hat?"
"On your head you spanner monkey!!!"

by Jack Skipp February 16, 2004