The quality or condition of being afflicted with a terminal inability to read-between-the-lines and only comprehend concepts and situations in a strict non-figurative sense.
She: “Hey sexy let’s go knock boots.”
He: “What do you mean?”
She: “Why don’tcha marinate the nether rod in the squish mitten…”
He: "You wanna what?"
She: “Wanna ‘Wham’ your ‘Oingo Boingo’ into my ‘Velvet Underground’?”
He: “Huh?”
She: “Come take the love luge on the inbound loin line”
He: “Pardon?”
She: “Tiptoe through my two lips…?”
He: “Ummm…I’m lost”
She: “Your literality drives me nuts...grab some imagination and gimme’ a clunge-plunge already!”
Bob: " Ugh...This golf cart is so SLOW! It'll take us 50,000 years to get to the other side of the golf course.
Billy: "So why don't we just walk there? We'll be long dead if we continue to ride this thing."
Bob: "Stop being a literalist, Billy. You know it wouldn't literally take that long.
"I posted on my facebook status that I was so exhausted that I needed a couple lines of blow to keep functioning. My sister read it and called my mom and told her I may have a drug problem. She's such a Facebook Literalist."
Sister: This meeting was to discuss the rough draft of my essay, where we discussed the subsidiary questions I added in my rough draft. We also discussed the relationship between my main title and the real-life situations I chose to use in my essay. We discussed the structure of my essay as well, specifically the Math AOK section and how it relates to the contradiction of the title. This second meeting was particularly helpful in discussing the implications of my essay claims and how to apply the title across various areas of knowledge. There were many sections of the essay that could have been cut down in wordiness and the ways of knowing required further and more in-depth analysis.
An absolutely foolproof way to keep minors from viewing content deemed "too mature" for them to watch.
Billy: "So I was trying to watch some videos for an M rated game, and I ran into an age gate, so I put in my real birthday. SOMEHOW it managed to figure out that I am 12. CURSE YOU AGE GATE!!!"
Bill: "Fucking age gate! *quick scroll* THERE! I was born on January 1, 1904. Fuck you age gate."
A)
The Crud that collects under the keys in a keyboard. Usually more severe in the keyboards of programmers and webmasters as they tend to spend a lot of time at the the computer and thus eat at their desk. Mainly affecting IBM Model M (clicly) style boards.
B)
Can also be used to gross out Non-Techie people
A)
Bill: want to go to the club?
Bob: No, I've got to clean out my board chow, keys are starting to stick.
B)
Bill: Want to go out to get a bite?
Bob: No, i am just going to have some of my board chow/
Bill: Whats' that?
Bob: The food scraps that collect in my keyboard; Want some?
Bill: *GAG* *HURL* *GAG*