The captain of the Jewish gold reserves. Commonly seen stealing money from unsuspecting customers and insider trading. Rides a magic sleigh. Wears red robes and winter gear. Delivers presents. Is not Santa Claus.
(sees captain jew gold)
Jewish boy: Look it's santa!
(gets hit by rabbi)
Jewish boy: I mean, look it's captain jew gold!
Jew gold is the term for the little bags of gold that Hebrew and Shebrew people wear around their necks. They also have a little bag of fake gold around their necks to distract people from the real gold.
Jew gold is a term for the small bag of gold that Jews wear around their neck. The purpose of jew gold is to buy heaven from God on Judgement Day. Jews carry two bags around their necks, one for the jew gold, and a decoy bag filled with rocks.
Popularized by 'Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow' episode number 908 of South Park, Jew Gold is the gold contained in a small bag that is hung around every Jewish man and womans neck. Every Jewish man and woman also carries a fake bag filled with rocks or other heavy items so it will be perceived as the real jew gold.