Jesuzfuck

An expression of surprise. A huge surprise! A surprise shocking enough that "Jesus" or "Fuck" .. or even "Jesus Fuck!" can't quite express the surprise. The surprise is epic enough to require a "Jesuzfuck!"

Husband: "Honey, I'm home.. you'll never guess what happened.. I won $100k on a scratch ticket!!"

Wife: "WHAT??? Jesuzfuck are you serious?

Jesuzfuck by cunning2627 April 7, 2021

jesusfuckingchrist 

A statement of utter disbelief expressed when one finds themselves in the worst case scenario. Can be announced slowly and clearly to express disgust and hopelessness, or loud and fast to alert someone of an imminent disaster that will most likely end in catastrophe.

When Ted realized the car was running out of gas, he pulled to the side of the road and got out of the car. He muttered "JesusFuckingChrist" when he saw that he just drove over nails and now had two flat tires.

Just before the fireball, Ted screamed "JESUSFUCKINGCHRIST!" as he saw Fred trying to light a cigarette while pumping gas.

jesusfuckingchrist by rockythecat December 5, 2009

Jesusfucker 

1. One who fucks Jesus
2. An ass hole; Douchebag; etc.
3. A particularly delicious chocolate cake from Chili's

"Man that cake was such a jesusfucker! Why don't we go to Chili's more often?"

"Shut up! God, you're such a Jesusfucker!"

Jesusfucker by sarah is radd March 26, 2009

jesusfuck 

A curse word and highly irresponsible interjection.

(apologies to all you religious types, but it IS used every now and then...)

Mr A: Hey, man, catch!
Mr B: OH JESUSFUCK! *SMACK*

jesusfuck by Garnet Red September 28, 2004

jesusfuckshits 

Three great expletives that greatly go together. It starts out like Jesus, as though you were saying Jesus Christ. Then skips the gay Christ part and heads straight for the greatest expletive of all time, Fuck. Now Fuck, which is usually just an emoticon or sometimes a noun, becomes an adjective; modifying, in an almost unimaginable way, shits.

Holy fucking fuckshit Christ man. Jesusfuckshits where'd you put my dime bag motherfucker?

jesusfuckshits by Sharkey November 24, 2004

Jesusfuckincuntingchrist 

An exclamation of extreme disbelief or anger , or discontent

Jesusfuckincuntingchrist !! This is such a pain in the ass.

Jesusfuckincuntingchrist by LooooLOOO October 18, 2023