I am in constant agony. My life is a mess. As a kid I had a natural aptitude for math and science, but I let it get to my head, ultimately ruining my possibility to go to college.
I wasted my life playing video games and watching the television; the natural talents I once had have apathied and worn away, leaving the one thing I was good at behind.
My life has been nothing but a fastly accelerating downward spiral and I have failed to provide anything of with to anyone.
Isaiah: Hey, Ed! Haven't seen you in a few years, how are you don't?
Me: I am in constant agony, this is not a joke; please help me.
A common response, usually used by women, to when they feel insulted about something that might be pertaining to there weight. Can also be used sarcastically.
Girl: I'm going to jump on that trampoline okay?
Boy: No, my that trampoline is bad, you'd break it.
Girl: Is that a fat joke?
Friend 1: Get out of the way! I can't see the TV!
Friend 2: Is that a fat joke?
Friend 1: Kind of.
(Slap!)
When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Short-hand for the word floccinaucinihilipilification, meaning the estimation of something as valueless (encountered mainly as an example of one of the longest words in the English language).