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IVF 

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In Vitro Fertilisation

Most people are under the misconception that IVF starts with harvesting eggs from the woman and sperm from the man. It actually starts weeks before that with the woman having to administer daily hormone injections. First these hormones induce a temporary menopause then further injections stimulate the ovaries to develop a number of follicles. This whole process is carefully monitored as serious complications can occur.

Only once the follicles are ready are the eggs ripened and then collected in a surgical procedure under sedation or anaesthetic. Sperm is collected at this time and with some luck eggs fertilise and embryos start to develop.

After a couple of days (or five if going to blastocyst stage) usually either one or two embryos are placed into the uterus and the couple must wait two weeks to find out if they are pregnant.

IVF is a harrowing treatment which many patients describe as an emotional rollercoaster but many infertility patients are more than willing to put themselves through this (often on numerous occasions) in the hope to have a family.
Raise awareness of infertility!

IVF offers hope and has allowed many people to have a family who otherwise would have never know the joy of having a child of their own.
IVF by Little Miss Me September 30, 2010
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ivf 

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In Vitro Fertilisation.


In vitro is latin for 'in glass'.


This is a medical process whereby couples having trouble concieving will go recieve help, and concieve without actual intercourse. The male jizzes into a bunch of plastic cups, before the healthy and fast-moving sperm are collected together and crammed in a test tube with ovary produce of the female. After a week or so the female is told to lie on her back before a phallic-shaped tube is rammed deep inside her hole and she recieves some jizz with healthy sperm. This greatly increases chances of fertilisation, but still only 30% of couples concieve. The first "test tube baby" was born Louise Brown in 1978 in the United Kingdom.


The word is sometimes used as an insult
Your parents had IVF to get you, because your dad has one ball!
ivf by Gumba Gumba May 27, 2004
Related Words

IVF mum 

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40-something first-time mother who's given up a high-flown job and organises her baby mercilessly, feeding it fresh organic veg and buying only the most expensive natural fibre designer clothing. Only the best will do!
Awww, baby Emily is sooo cute - GOD, is that a non-GE goats-milk latte in her bottle?? What an IVF mum!
IVF mum by lizly November 12, 2008

IVF mum 

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40-something first-time "perfect" mother who manages her baby relentlessly, feeding it only the choicest organic veg and dressing it in non-GE natural-fibre designer clothing.
Look at that poor baby in the 4-wheel drive bio-fuel buggy...OMG is it wearing Armani??? WHAT an IVF mum!
IVF mum by lizly November 10, 2008

IVF goals 

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A handsome face that a pretty woman would want to IVF with
Howard Kevin Stern is IVF goals
IVF goals by TheBlueLeo April 18, 2019

IVF Unicorn baby

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An IVF baby born (alive still born or #phoenixbaby resurrection) after a first ever embryo transfer (fresh or frozen doesn’t matter) after Years and years and or many years of infertility, ART, and even IVF treatments… (ours was the second round of stims because of NY Covid shutdown prevented our first full round of finished stims and needles and pushing back our retrieval to a cancellation making the cycle a wash failure because of Covid shutdown)…

This is a humbling experience… not one to brag about… because it is something that even shocked our doctors at NYU Langone reproductive specialists of NY especially our amazing RE/IVF doctor Gudas. Would highly recommend all the doctors at NYU Langone on Long Island… they are worth the money and the distance if you need to travel… and NY is a prochoice state… so your choice in what happens to your dna/embryos.
Our IVF Unicorn Baby just turned 21 (months) yesterday! Our baby also is a true Unicorn baby because our baby has always slept through the night since day one! Lolz and is a Gemini lolz so all the more reason our kid is a double headed Unicorn 🦄🦄 lolz and no we’re not bragging just humbled by our parenting experience… because we know that others may never have these experiences even as much as we all hope to have, nothing is guaranteed in life… as our child could die and stay dead in the next 5 minutes, tomorrow or years from now and it humbles us all the more.

ivfp 

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Isla Vista foot patrol,police that patrol the streets in the college town in Santa Barbara.generally go around arresting college kids for being drunk in public and giving minor in posesion tickets.known for they're completly unjustified descrimitory behaviour against young people.
''dude i was five yards from my house and the ivfp jumped out at me and asked for some ID''
ivfp by hella-hella-fo-sho-fo-sho January 5, 2008
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