Skip to main content
an absolute mad man with a penis that can stretch around the universe
me: have you seen cristof’s penis?
someone: no why?
me: it’s massive
Cristof by biggblackethballs May 22, 2021
Urban Dictionary Merch
Small penis last name is usually garcia. Has shown people his penis. He is extremely gay
Omg cristof is so small!
cristof by hahahahahajjahahahagay2 February 6, 2014
Yeah, no. You're clearly not doing the thing you're doing. That isn't a thing that is happening. I just THINK that you're doing the thing that you're doing and because you're the good one you are justified in doing it. It couldn't possibly be the other way around. There would be no possible way from me to identify what it is that you are doing and respond accordingly. Additionally, what would constitute "responding accordingly" could only ever be "the thing that you want me to do" and not anything else. Because if I do the thing you want me to do then it just proves that you were justified in doing the thing that you are doing and that you behaved appropriately. But if I do anything negative in response to what you're doing it isn't your fault. Because the only logical conclusion that can be drawn from what you're doing is for me to do the thing you want me to do AND NOTHING ELSE. So if I do SOMETHING ELSE then it isn't your fault that I did the thing. It's like ADVICE.
Hym "Damn dawg..."

Iam "What?"

Hym "I am mad good at words G! My intellectual and verbal prowess are astounding!"

Iam "Our oration could use some work... So could our conversational English..."

Hym "Wow you are a spoiled sport! Can't you let me have anything? We got Cristof over here raining on our parade all the time now won't even let me have my moment?"

Iam "Sorry..."
Cristof by Hym Iam May 19, 2022

Husoos Cristo en una muleta 

Spanish for the phrase, "Jesus Christ on a crutch", which means "o shuit" or "o fuuuuucccckkkk!!!"
Is this laser waterproof?
Husoos Cristo en una muleta NOOOO!!!!
he is really smeaxy,loyal,tall,smart, awesome, and kind really athletic
cristobal is a reallyy nice guy
cristobal by kelvin123 September 5, 2019

Cristoval 

The coolest guy you will meet even for a short time hese worth your time 😍
Hey girl did you hear about Cristoval hese so amazing
Cristoval by killer swagg April 13, 2015

Christoffer 

Funny, intelligent, nice, caring, really good in bed but can also be a dick. He is down to do anything which makes him fun
I’d totally smash Christoffer
Christoffer by Henrietta the boss October 2, 2019
More from Urban Dictionary
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
Next