Contembating 

One who is contemplating to masturbate, but questioning why or why not during such session. Or One who is making a serious or life changing decision while masturbating.

Wife - "Honey did you decide whether or not the baby is a good idea"
Husband - "Well, after a few hours of contembating, I have made this life changing serious decision."

Contembating by Corey The Frack April 13, 2010

Congerbating 

To masturbate while fantasizing about someone so intently, that you start to believe you actually had sex with that person.

Congerbater: Hey you know that Jessica chick? man I nailed her hard.

Friend A: No, I know for a fact that you did not. You were Congerbating again weren't you?

Congerbating by Kamisama-x November 6, 2009

consterbating 

The act of or fulfilling one's own desire to forcefully withdrawal a brown dragon while playfully caressing the penile shaft.

Anthony: So, you think John's consterbating in there??
Dustin: Smells like it.
Anthony: Well, it can't be too painful, he's got a porn mag in his hand.

consterbating by John's mother April 2, 2007

contemputing 

when you’re so fucking baked that nothing seems real and you’re spaced the FUCK out

“holy shit dude that bong rip has me contemputing”

contemputing by icky.vicky420 October 17, 2020

jerb 

well known from south park
rednecks get angrry that future folk took there jobs so they yell
They took ouare jerbs!

Them future folk took ouare jerbs!

jerb by Jimberley Kim April 7, 2005

Cheeks 

An Irish phrase meaning shit, derived from ass
(Not to be confused with the literal description of one's buttocks)

"Did you hear the song Aylek$ dropped?"
"Hardly. Her music is absolute cheeks."

"My boyfriend say LaFlame is cheeks."
"Tell your boyfriend I said it's his mixtape that's cheeks."

Cheeks by thecartisan April 26, 2020

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility

I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.

sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019